


Blanks For My Head, Blanks For My Heart

by Subatomic_grape



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drama, F/M, Mystery, Romance, Suspense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-01
Updated: 2013-05-01
Packaged: 2017-12-10 04:09:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 45,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/781597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Subatomic_grape/pseuds/Subatomic_grape
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The past has a nasty way of catching up with you, even when you try to start over with a clean slate.  Megan Morse quickly learns this as her normal life is replaced by one full of strange and uncomfortable truths about herself, teammates, and old threats that aren’t ready to be forgotten.  Supermartian AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: Storm Front

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Young Justice Big Bang, this thing was a real challenge to complete. Still, I'm quite proud of the final result, and hope you'll enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. As a warning, some of the story content deals with or mentions suicidal thoughts.

M'gann M'orzz clutched the papers close to her chest, the storm front making them rustle like a handful of dead leaves. The wind tugged at her hair as her feet stretched out, touching down on the ground and dropping out of the worst of the crosswinds. Her clothing had already morphed, trading out her costume for a plain civilian skirt and shirt. The red X she kept, crisscrossing her chest and sewn into the fabric of her white shirt. For a brief moment, she considered making the main fabric black instead, but the thought instantly made her eyes sting. M'gann blinked to clear them, glancing around her surroundings.

With everyone indoors to get out of the dark and the storm blowing in, it made for a lonely sports field. Overhead, the sky rumbled as clouds choked out the scant rays from the moon. The trees outside of the game field and lining the campus roads and walkways were sighing from the wind stirring through them, barely visible over the bleachers in that gloom. No trace of anyone braving the night, or the storm.

All that emptiness was welcome, though. She needed the isolation for what was coming next. M'gann glanced over the papers in her hand again, noting some of the information and tugging it into a cleared corner of her mind.

But beyond that, in the very back of her mind, there was a low key, almost worried buzzing. Her ship couldn't form words, but it could manage something close to emotions. And just then it was intent on digging a sharp edged bolt of worry into her head, trying to coax her back into the air where it was.

Instead, M'gann dug her feet into the ground, and pushed any hint of levitation out of her mind. The ship hummed as her skin lightened from green to Caucasian, almost dipping lower out of its place in the sky…It seemed to know what she had planned, and also that there wasn't a chance of talking her out of it.

" _Go,"_ M'gann whispered to her ship, knowing that her mental voice was choked and steeped in raw sadness. _"Go where ever you want, but don't come back here. Go on!"_ She forced her words to crack with anger, which hurt just as much as that rawness…But it at least had the desired effect. A swish as the air was pushed aside and cut through, and she could hear the ship turning away from her in confusion. M'gann didn't turn to look at the ship as it left, knowing that if she did, she would likely call it back. Instead she imagined it shrugging off her harsh voice, and slowly picking its way back to Mount Justice.

…Back to the others. M'gann shut her eyes again as the first drops of rain started to patter out of the sky and soaked into her hair, remembering.

It had been a fast, hurried packing job, where M'gann was only half aware of what she threw into the backpack. Just things she thought she might need; the few spare changes of clothing she had, a toothbrush…Papers that she'd sneaked out of the database, before deleting any digital trail from the computers. Before she left, M'gann made sure to give Gar a kiss on the cheek, gentle enough not to wake him. She also left instructions to her uncle regarding her little brother, and Conner…She had stood outside his door for what felt like hours, staring at the sheet of metal between him and her, before finally turning and leaving without ever saying a word. Maybe she should have said sorry to him again; another apology was going through her mind just then, as the thunder growled louder across the sky and lightning lit up her surroundings…Not that the word would change much.

Her eyes flickered open again, glancing around as more drops of rain splashed across her arms and started to sigh as it pattered the grass in the field down flat. She'd spent time at this place, before. Long before things went bad, and the minutes she'd dwindled away had always been at the edge of campus, soaking in what she could of the ambience. Hearing people complaining about homework, switching over to excitement when they talked about plans for after class, and how all of it reminded her of the best parts of her shows.

Now, M'gann lifted her gaze to that space between the prongs of the goal post, and the rooflines of the school building beyond it. Tilted her head up, locked her eyes on the scenery, and let the surroundings saturate her thoughts. More lightning crackled across the sky, burning a bright white light into her eyes and her head.

 _'Push it out,'_ she told herself as some of those thoughts screamed and struggled against the tide, while that stored information on the papers started to leech in. _'Push it ALL out.'_ Her heart picked up, and her vision started to spin as everything drowned in that white, erasing light that was flooding through her mind. It seeped into her vision as well, blinding and tearing away at the buildings and scoreboards as she watched.

 _'I'm sorry-'_ M'gann had time to think and whisper, before everything was enveloped. _'But I'm ready to forget.'_

When she opened her eyes again, she found herself blinking rainwater out of them. Her long hair was plastered against her neck, while her shoulders twitched and shivered.

"What was I-?" She started to ask out loud, before realizing there was no one around to answer her question. Just herself, alone in a football field with some crumpled papers in hand, and a backpack near the ground. And some clothing on her back that was rapidly becoming waterlogged.

When she looked down at her shirt, there was a flicker of confusion as she saw the red X tracing across her chest. Something about that might have been important…But she couldn't grasp what. And the content in those papers seemed more important; declaring that she was enrolling here, and had likely gotten caught up in the storm.

Megan Morse blinked at her name written on the papers, before clutching them and her bag close as she turned and ran for the nearest building, ready to get out of the storm.


	2. Megan The Mundane

"You can stop trying to hide that smile, Megan. You're gloating, and I already know it." Megan tugged her head up from the yams on her plate, and gave the black haired girl sitting across from her a look of pure (and slightly exaggerated) affront.

"Wendy! I don't gloat!" If anything, that made her friend's blue eyes twinkle just a little more, although the other girl kept the rest of her face impassive.

"No, I guess not…You just switch out normal cheerfulness for obnoxious cheerfulness once you do well on a test."

"You," Megan poked her lunch with a fork as she spoke, punctuating her words with the motion "are being sulky, since I scored better then you did." That at least earned her a blink and a similarly offended look from Wendy.

"Hey! Megan, if you don't do gloating, then I don't do sulky." They managed to mock glare at each other for a full five seconds before Wendy gave a 'snnrk,' and Megan's lips pulled up into a grin. They laughed hard enough that several heads turned towards their corner of the student lounge, which they faithfully ignored.

Wendy was the first to quiet down, shaking her head as she ran a hand through her hair, which only seemed to be getting shorter and richer in black as the semesters ticked by. "I…Might be a little jealous, I admit. You just transferred here a semester ago, and you've already had no trouble keeping up with the course work. You're going to edge me out of my own major at this point."

Megan shook her head, focusing on getting a few deep breaths of her own to smooth out any left over giggles. She brushed a few strands of her own hair back behind her ear, letting it fall past her shoulders. "Not likely; you want to study communications and satellites. I want to keep my attention on Earth's place in the solar system, and just that. No fancy hardware for me, thanks." She favored Wendy with a bright smile as she spoke, nodding towards the collection of notes pushed to the far end of the table; it was easy to pick out Wendy's collection from hers, the handwriting almost mathematically neat and dealing with technical information that still made her head spin. Hers, by contrast, were half squiggles and half cursive script, and the only bit of math she had down was Earth's rotation and distance from the sun. Megan blinked her eyes to clear some of the number crunching from her head, instead pulling her focus back to lunch.

"Here, I brought some dessert for us." Her hands drifted down to her backpack, which was still holding up admirably after the thorough soaking it had received when she first arrived, and the constant travel afterwards. The zipper still moved with a smooth little hum, and M'gann drew a cookie out that she dutifully cut in half. She could almost taste the chocolate and moist dough in the air as the treat was split apart, and she held a piece out.

"I've been experimenting with the recipe again, and I think I've got something really good this time-"

"Megan. It's ALWAYS good." Wendy cut her off, taking her half of the dessert and giving it a nibble. Megan's chest clenched up as she frowned, and shook her head. "And are you my roommate, or my nanny?"

"You don't like it?" She cast her eyes down, and Wendy instantly darted her hand out to rest on Megan's. Her voice had lost that slightly brittle edge when she spoke.

"No, no, it tastes great…And sorry, I didn't mean anything by that. It's just kind of hard to be the responsible sophomore when the freshman I'm supposed to be looking after cooks lunch and beats my old test score."

"It's not like I'm younger then you are," Megan pointed out, nibbling the edge of her portion. "I just…Started a year later." She frowned a little at the treat, feeling something about the sentence stick on her tongue. It was just a fact, though…Which didn't explain why she felt a bit unsure about it.

"Yeah, I guess so…" Wendy thankfully picked up the slack in the conversation. "Although it could be lucky you started a year later. I was just hearing about what you get to do in Planetary Relations 101, and the assignment you get out of it." At Megan's confused blink, she shook her head in disbelief. "Haven't you even been reading the syllabus? This quarter is going to be relations with other planets. I heard Miss Callie talking about it and everything; you'll get to focus on Mars, with the current events. Guess we should just be glad Marvin took this semester off, huh?"

She must have not baked that cookie as well as she thought. There was a brief sour taste in her mouth, and when Megan swallowed there was also a dryness that she had to work down her throat. The cookie felt rough against her tongue and the roof of her mouth, and the knot in her stomach convinced Megan to set it back down on the table.

"Megan?" Her name broke through that knot and nausea demanding her attention. As she listened, Megan rubbed at her forehead, pushing her fingers against her skin to give herself something else to focus on.

"O-oh! Right. Yeah, lucky alright! That'd be just like him to make some trouble out of it." Wendy didn't look fully convinced by her smile, but thankfully the 1:00 bell opted to chime off then. A signal that lunch was over, and those with class had about fifteen minutes to get there. Megan was glad to focus on it, and shift her attention to clearing the table.

"See you after class for cheerleading?" Her friend asked as she shouldered her backpack. Megan gave a quick nod and replied "Of course! I'll see you then; and maybe we can see about studying that Mars project, if you're interested in it."

That at least got a warm look from Wendy, and Megan gave her a gentle wave before they drifted away towards their own classes.

-o-o-o-

The cell phone felt weird against his ear, and fragile in his hand. Conner would have gladly swapped it out for a comm link in his ear…But all of his teammates had agreed to a man that talking into one of these tiny little machines would look less suspicious then talking into thin air. Which, based on his memories of high school, he had to agree with. And as Conner stepped into the campus, it was immediately obvious that not much had changed between the two education environments. Maybe the grounds were larger then before, with taller, slightly more austere buildings…But the students talking on phones were mostly the same. So, he noticed with a scowl, was the habit of people wearing t-shirts with Justice League emblems and symbols plastered across them. He'd been hoping that stupid habit was something left in high school, and finding that it wasn't didn't improve his mood or voice any.

"I'm in." He growled into the phone. "Scoping out the environment now-"

"Con." Came a rumble of a voice on the other end of the line, which helped mask some of the exasperation he could pick out in the words. "Stick to normal, casual speech. You're supposed to be under cover."

"…Fine. I've arrived, and I'm looking around." 'Is that better?' he wanted to add on snappishly, but instead waited for Mal's response.

"Okay…Good. You sticking to the entrance?" Conner glanced back at the wall ringing the campus, lined with ironwork fence posts and trees, and looking wholly New England when it came to design. He was frankly surprised M'gann hadn't opted to go somewhere further from home when it came to cutting and running…But then, he couldn't always understand what went through her head.

"Yeah. Staying low profile enough not to get any attention-"

"Huh. That's a change for you."

"…And watching to see if I can catch any sign of her." He had to work to keep a growl from his voice, although to his surprise his lips pulled up in a slight smirk from Mal's comment. He wasn't yanking anyone off skateboards and growling about shirts, at least…Even if both of those things probably would have gotten some of that frustration out of his head.

It didn't help that he still hadn't caught any sign of M'gann, even with all the people moving around. "You're sure this is the place to start?"

"Yeah. Talked it out with Nightwing, and he says this is one of the likeliest places M'gann is at." A few clicking keys, telling Conner that his teammate was looking over the data as well. "He's been looking at the school records. There's a couple dozen Megans in this campus as is, but only one of them with the last name Morse. And she arrived just a few months ago."

"Sounds like a lead," Conner admitted, before cutting off and hearing a sudden rustling on the other end of the phone, and Mal biting down on what sounded like a curse. "Anything else I should know?"

"…Yeah, the kid just got impatient and decided to go after you before we could stop him. He's probably going to be there any second-"

Conner was already glancing towards the sky, knowing that if Gar had a preference, he would probably come in from the air. True to Mal's guess, it wasn't long before he could pick out a splotch of green half falling, half flying out of the sky.

"…I'll call you back." He grumbled before mashing the 'end call' button with his thumb while trying not to break the screen. Right as there was a flutter of wings and a small weight settled on his shoulder.

"Beast Boy incognito, reporting for duty!" Gar's voice chirped into his ear, barely masked by the fact he was several sizes shorter, and feathered. Conner counted his blessings that he'd stayed under that tree, and no one was turning to look at him just yet, even with something that looked like a green, pint sized parrot on his shoulder.

"…A bright green talking bird doesn't usually fall under being discreet. And definitely not on a college campus." He finally managed to say, with a minimal amount of groaning. It wasn't like the red collar around his neck helped much either.

"But budgerigars are supposed to be green!" Gar protested. "And they can mimic and memorize all sorts of words, AND they're companion animals. It's the perfect cover!" He sounded so proud about figuring that out, too. "Besides, I'M needed for communication relay. I can be all covert and take information between you and Thunderbird One-"

"Thunderbird WHAT?" Conner cut him off, doing his best to stay straight faced and knowing that the campus would notice if he was staring incredulously at a bird. Talking or not.

"Th-Thunderbird One? You know…The code name I made for Mal, before we left? Gar offered meekly, ruffling his feathers as he spoke. "We've all got codenames, I thought he could use one too." He couldn't think of how to respond to that, so Conner settled for focusing on the other part of Beast Boy's plan.

"Kid…You're making this more complicated then it needs to be. We don't NEED a complicated relay system to talk back and forth; that's what I have this," fragile, dinky, obnoxiously slim "cell phone for in the first place."

"But…Maybe you'll be in a situation where you can't use things electronically? Like when you needed the telepathic link sis could make, before?" Gar's voice was oddly quiet as he spoke, although Conner didn't immediately pick out why since he was busy letting his breath out in a sigh.

"I don't think something like that is going to come up. Look, you don't even need to be here-" The bird on his shoulder hunched forward, wings drawn in close. His knowledge of avian body language had been rudimentary in Cadmus, and he hadn't picked up more since then…But Conner thought he could at least pick out there wasn't anything happy about his posture. And that, just possibly, Conner himself was being a bit abrasive.

"Yeah but…I just was hoping that I could help you and s-sis…"

' _Oh.'_ He had room to think, and felt his expression soften up a little. "…Right," Conner managed, giving himself a brief mental shake. "Guess you could hang around. Might be good to have all the bases covered anyway…And have someone watching my back." That got Beast Boy to perk back up, and lose that hunched over posture. "Guess it's better then monkeys, at least." He muttered, before speaking up. "Hey, did you see anyone while you were in the air?"

"Y-yeah! I remembered to check!" Gar's tone brightened as he spoke. "I saw someone that…Looked kind of like Marie." And just as quickly, it went dull, although the kid soldiered on. "Same red hair, and she was heading for the buildings across campus. I bet we could do a stake out? I could take the high spots on one end, and you on the other," he paused, and Conner rolled his shoulders in a shrug.

"Good enough plan. If you see anyone that looks like her, tell me. And," he didn't have time to say 'keep a low profile' before Gar took off with an eager chirp. Conner allowed himself a second to roll his eyes, before trudging off after the junior teammate, boots feeling heavy on the grass.

-o-o-o-

There had been some hope in Megan's head that the enthusiasm Wendy had for her assignment would be contagious. And in a way, the photographs of Mars and facts on their neighboring planet had been interesting…But part of her head stayed in a strange, anxious knot that fogged over her thoughts all through class. It was only afterwards, when she picked her way to the locker room for cheerleading, that her mind started to feel like it was getting fresh oxygen.

"Be out in a minute," she told Wendy as they passed in the doorway. Her friend had already slipped into the cheerleading uniform, and Megan made a beeline to the lockers to slip her own on.

It was blessedly cool and calm inside, with most of the team already changed out. The tiles lining all four sides of the room, alternating between white and a calm blue, gave her the feeling of slipping into a cave and away from the rush of campus life. And also gave Megan a chance to reflect on that lesson and lecture as she started to shed her clothes.

' _Not a lot is known about the fourth planet from the sun, outside of geological information. The customs and lives of its people are a mystery to us,'_ her hair stood up a little from the static as she shucked her shirt. _'But we have at least one example to look for in the Martian Manhunter-'_

The recitation cut out as she tossed her shirt, and reached for the top of the cheerleader uniform. Her arms stretched out, and Megan could feel the cool air from the locker room settling over them. She could also feel them go heavy, and her fingers fumble with cloth under her fingers. The top dropped to the floor, while her fingers splayed against the metal doors as a sudden stiffness settled over them and started to spread along her arms.

She knew what to do with that, at least, and fell into the routine before that tenseness had a chance to spread out any further. Her fingers curled into fists, then relaxed out, and Megan kept her focus on that sensation, letting any off-center feelings leak out of her body as her mind shifted away from them. The trick worked like a charm, and she opened her eyes once her balance came back with a satisfied sigh.

That satisfaction lasted all of one second, until she caught a flash of bright color along the edge of her vision, just off in the far upper corners of her eyes. Megan's head snapped up and glanced to her side, trying to focus on what she was sure had been something green. Her eyes darted around, before settling on where she must have spotted it; all she found was a mirror at the other end of the room, holding her reflection. It looked back at her with a wary, tense posture and a confused expression, and Megan forced her eyes away from it as she tried to shrug on her uniform and get outside as quickly as possible. No dwelling on anything else, except practice.

Wendy was waiting for her in the field, one eye on the cheerleading team, the other on the doors to the gym. When Megan stepped out, that focus instantly shifted to her.

"What kept you?" Wendy asked, before meeting Megan eye to eye and seeing how prominent the whites of her eyes were. "Megan? Did something happen?"

"N-nothing!" She bolted to attention and rushed to get that out, trying to make it sound truthful. And she at least felt better, being outside and hopefully leaving that unease in the locker room. "Sorry, I was just thinking about that class assignment. I'm ready to get my head in the game, though." That wasn't a complete lie, at least. And Megan felt ready to make the last part of it a full truth.

"Okay," Wendy's voice carried a definite undertone of 'if you say so' as she looked between Megan and the team. "How about a few quick stretches, and then get into formation with the rest of us?"

"On it already!" Megan flexed and moved her legs and arms out, limbering up the muscles as she spoke. There was something satisfying in feeling her limbs relax, stretch, relax-

Feel insistently heavy and tight on her bones for a moment, before falling back into place like a properly fitted glove. Megan frowned down at them as that rough feeling came and went again. This wasn't the first time she'd felt a brief pang of unease…But that did very little to dampen the sensation, or make her arms feel less awkward. She watched as the others went through their cartwheels, feeling a jolt of envy as she rocked on the balls of her feet. _'Come on, Megan.'_ She whispered to herself. _'You can do it just as smooth.'_ And to prove it, she tumbled forward into a handstand before rolling off into a cartwheel.

"Not bad," Wendy commented, right as Megan thought _'could be better.'_ "How about stepping over to that group, and working on the flips? We can move onto the more complicated stuff once everyone's warmed up." She didn't hesitate to follow that, and the next half hour passed by blessedly calm. Just focusing on spins, smooth movements, and feeling herself slowly relax as the activity picked up. In this, at least, she felt like she was right at home with tumbling and weaving through the air.

"Hey, Megan." A teammate broke through that revere when she whispered in Megan's ear with a sly voice. "Don't look now, but you've got yourself an admirer." Her head was already twitching to look over her shoulder, before she froze up. Her eyes also wanted to dart over to steal a glance at whoever was being talked about, but she forced them to stay fixed ahead.

"Smart move." The cheerleader praised her. "Now trust me on this; don't look too closely at him, and pretend you're focused just on practice. Guys like that LOVE a girl who plays hard to get, or shy." She saw Megan's eyes darting everywhere, still not picking out who they were even talking about, and added, "Just behind us. He's that tall, broody freshman over at the edge of the bleachers. Looks like a real catch!"

"I thought you had a boyfriend?" Megan couldn't keep from commenting as she stretched her arms out, getting ready to vault onto the pyramid.

"Yeah, but I can compliment my teammate when she gets a stud. Heads up!" Megan stepped into those cupped hands, and was launched upwards. As she twirled in the air, she tried to scan the benches…And for a moment caught sight of a black haired figure. And she didn't think she imagined that those oddly striking, bright blue eyes were fixed on her. Looking at them was enough to leave her shaky, although she managed to land in place and brace her feet without any fumbling.

-o-o-o-

It was her; the same long red hair, lips that were fixed in a curious, hopeful smile…All that was missing was the green skin, but the freckles were still the same. Conner let his breath out slow as he watched her, privately amazed that she hadn't changed at all in the months she'd been gone. There was a moment where he saw her twist in the air, and with a quick flick of her head somehow find him with her eyes. Their vision locked for a moment, and he waited for something to pass between them. Much as it made his shoulders tense up, Conner was half expecting a small mental brush between them, or a surprised 'Conner?' from her, either out loud or between their minds.

What he got instead was a startled look from her…And then nothing. Not a hint of her in his head, or even a look of recognition from her.

"Uh, Superboy?" Gar kept his voice quiet in Conner's ear. "Was that supposed to happen? I thought we were here to get in contact with M'gann."

"We are." His voice couldn't decide whether it wanted to be gruff or bewildered, which was a good match for his emotions. "I don't know what she's doing, but…When we get an opening, we figure out what's going on." A part of him wanted to storm in right then and demand an explanation from her; the disappearance, the lack of communication either then or now…But his feet stayed rooted to the ground, as a more rational part of his thoughts reminded him of the words 'low profile.'

"Looks like they're wrapping it up. Time to engage?" The amount of eagerness trying to mask as cool headedness in Beast Boy's voice made him want to roll his eyes. Instead he gave a nod, and forced his feet forward.

"…Yeah. Follow my lead and…" He still doubted that pet budgerigars were common on campus, but still finished with "Don't do anything out of the norm. We're not supposed to draw any attention."

"Yeah, just hers." Gar added with an almost smug touch, before going quiet and bobbing his head in a bird like fashion as M'gann turned to look at them. Her eyes widened, and his former teammate looked like she was going to retreat until one of the cheerleaders she'd been practicing with whispered something in her ear, and gave her a nudge forward. That seemed to decide her, as she walked to their spot at the stands.

' _Right. Time for answers.'_ Conner decided as he squared his jaw and moved forward as well. M'gann's steps were uncertain as she walked towards them, and her eyes couldn't decide whether they were going to look straight at him, or at the ground. That alone was weird, and when they got within speaking distance, she cut him off before he could even begin asking what she was doing.

"H-Hey; don't think I've seen you around here before." She offered, her voice shy. "Did you just transfer in?"

There were a dozen possible answers to that, he knew in the back of his mind. With 'why are you dodging what happened by asking THAT' being the most pressing, and 'what are you trying to do' coming second…But both of them and all those others vanished once he really made eye contact with her. When she finished speaking, M'gann looked up at him and froze for a split second longer then those first few glances they'd exchanged; long enough for him to get a good long look into her eyes…And see nothing close to recognition. Her gaze didn't soften the way they normally did when they looked at each other, and the only thing he could pick out was confusion fogging over her eyes as she watched him.

"You don't know me?" Came out of his mouth instead.

"No…I'm sorry, have we met?" Still no familiarity in her eyes, just a hesitation to meet him completely eye to eye that threatened to pull him straight back into the past, when they first met. And then she shyly added on "But…I like your jacket?" Which threatened to yank that balance he'd been trying to build up back out from under him again.

That was when Gar decided hop out from behind Conner's head and onto his shoulder, and to speak up. Or chirp up. He didn't use words, but cut into the moment with a twitter that brought Megan's eyes up and put a smile back on her face. A hesitant one, but still better then that confused look.

"A budgie!" M'gann practically chirped as well, her eyes lighting up as she put her hand out. Gar returned the sound with a friendly, almost chuckling noise, butting his head against a cautiously outstretched finger. "And so friendly, too. Does he know any words?"

' _Only ones that qualify as smartass.'_ Conner thought to himself. Out loud he started to say "A few-"

When Gar cut him off with a whistle and chattered "Hello pretty bird!" M'gann laughed as her cheeks went slightly pink, and Conner wondered if he could pitch Gar over the goalpost before his wings took over.

"Where did he learn that?"

"Not from me." He growled, wishing that he could give Gar a scalding look. (He was pretty sure he could manage that, even without heat vision.) His eyes stayed fixed on the girl in front of him, though, still trying and failing to find something that showed she remembered him.

"Is he yours?" She asked instead of showing any recognition.

' _No'_ Conner thought, while saying "Sort of," and earning an indignant squawk. "I mean, I'm taking care of him for a friend, so he's sort of not." If anything, Gar sounded more offended at that. _'You should have told me your cover before this started'_ he grumbled in his own head.

"Well, either way he's adorable. You must love having him around." A pause, and then she tapped her forehead with her fingers in a motion that was so like the person that had left the cave…And yet unlike her at the same time, as she left it at just that. No catchphrase, no bopping herself with the palm of the hand.

"I haven't introduced myself! But, I'm Megan Morse; it's my first year here as a student, majoring in studies on Earth in astronomy. So, what's your name?" Her voice was so cheerful and openly curious that he had to fight down a growl over that question. If he could have, he would just introduce himself as Superboy; a straightforward name with no awkward connections…But he wasn't wearing the S-shield, and while he was technically on a mission, this girl in front of him wasn't part of the team. She was also losing that curious look for a worried one, and he forced himself to answer.

"…Conner." He eased the name out between a set of teeth that wanted to clamp down on it. "Conner Kent."

"Alliteration! It matches Megan Morse pretty well, too." Superboy tried to put on a smile at that, but the best he could manage was forming his lips into a tighter line. Gar simply tilted his head from side to side, giving a confused chirp.

"Look, I…Sorry, but I need to get going." He backed up a step, as Megan (and it did something weird to his chest and throat, calling her that instead of M'gann) blinked at him in confusion. And maybe a touch of sadness, he thought, but that could have just been how her bangs fell over her face as she glanced down.

"Well…Maybe I'll see you later? In class or on the field?"

"Y-yeah. Maybe." His ears burned when he stammered, but at least it got her to smile. He turned on his heel to leave, and thought he could just catch her waving goodbye. Part of him wanted to wave back to her, but instead he kept his hands jammed in his pockets. As he walked away, Gar stayed perched on his shoulder. And gave a not so innocent "tastes like chicken!" as he nipped at Conner's ear again.

"Kid, shut up before I turn your tail into a feather duster." That at least got him to take his beak away…But not stay quiet.

"Sorry; just wanted to lighten the mood. I really thought it was just an act she was doing-"

"She isn't that good of an actor." His shoulders slumped as he spoke. "Trust me…I know."

"Okay, noted. But…What now? Did she really-"

"I don't know." He let his boots scrape at the grass to try and work some of that frustration out. "But we meet with Mal and Karen now. Maybe they've got some ideas on what to do next."

"Don't you?" Gar's voice had dropped back into being nervous, and Conner wasn't sure he liked that any better than that tease from before.

"My plans were asking M'gann what was going on. I didn't think she'd…Not know it was me."

"I don't get it either." Beast Boy offered, nervously shifting from foot to foot. "It's like she didn't know or remember _anything._ "

' _And that's why we need to figure out what to do next.'_ Conner's feet picked up at that thought, and he found himself hurrying back, hoping that there was some sort of answer waiting with Malcolm.

-o-o-o-

That off feeling in her muscles finally caught up to her in the dormitory hall. Megan couldn't keep from sighing as she felt it leech back into her skin; she'd been certain that the hot shower in the locker room had been enough to keep her from feeling too awkward or ill at ease. Heat had always worked well before, when she wanted to numb out some of her thoughts.

But if her arms and legs were acting up when it came to moving, then at least her memories of the practice weren't being quiet either, and were doing a good job of distracting her from that sensation of her hips not sliding right when she walked.

That was easily one of the strangest practices she'd ever been at. Even ignoring the slowdown on some of her tumbles…That boy and his pet stayed prominent in her mind. Her mouth couldn't decide whether it wanted to frown or smile at that, as she turned the doorknob underhand. He'd been…Odd enough certainly, but there was almost something sweet about his manner. Or maybe it had just been because she could overlook some scowling when it came to how startling his eyes had been while watching her.

"Conner…Kent." She tested the name out loud, feeling it roll around on her tongue before coming out with an odd bite to it. There was a slight itch at the corner of her memories when she said it out loud, and only grew as she recalled their conversation.

"Déjà vu," Megan muttered to herself as she dropped her backpack, rolling her shoulders to try and shrug the sensation off. Just another odd coincidence that had been rolled into an already odd day.

"Hello, Wendy? You back?" She called out as she moved into the living room of the dorm, glancing around. The sofa stood in the middle, empty of any roommates, notes, or after school snacks, which convinced Megan that she was the first back. Her feet started to take her on a straight line to the kitchen, while she went over a mental list of what all she had in the fridge; the peanut caramel crunches were still in good supply, she thought. And they hadn't enjoyed it for a few days, making it a good candidate for tonight's study session-

Her balance went out before she could even think about Mars, or finish that step towards the kitchen. Blood roared in her head as Megan pitched forward, and her thoughts scattered as her knees hit the floor and threw her onto her hands. They shook as they hit the carpet of the dorm floor, and it felt like a solid iron weight had been pushed into her head. It sunk deep into her mind, pulling her thoughts apart and pushing a deep, painful collection of jolts in where they used to be. One of her hands came up to rub at her forehead-

Tried to come up. Something was wrong with her fingers, like they'd lost their solidity, and they wouldn't listen to her. The carpet dug into her hands, going from woven to rough, like there were dozens of sand grains getting pushed against her suddenly raw skin. She didn't want to glance down, nothing good could come from looking down, Megan somehow knew that...But her eyes were pulled towards the floor anyway.

The skin on her hands was bone white, gripped so hard that she could see the veins and knucklebones sticking out. Looking like they wanted to burst out of her skin, which felt tight all over her. And underneath her hands the apartment floor had been leached out and flooded over with something colored a harsh, orange red. Feeling like sand and tasting like iron in her mouth-

A loud, electric _pop_ cut into her, harsh enough that it tore a flinch out of Megan. She tasted blood where her teeth had bit her tongue, but when her eyes blinked open again, it was to a mundane apartment, without a trace of red to be seen anywhere. Her skin still felt raw and twitched as the muscles underneath tensed and relaxed.

"Wh-what just happened…?" She whispered, staring down at her hands. The silence stretching out and pressing in on her ears gave no answers, no matter how long she shivered in it.


	3. Sight For Strange Eyes

It was a relief when the team had a wall between themselves and the outside world. Gar wasted no time in flapping off Conner's shoulder, tumbling back into something with feet and hands before he ever landed on the floor. And once his feet were touching the carpet, giving Mal a crisp salute as the older teammate glanced up from the laptop on the table.

"Reporting in from the field, Thun- Um, Mal." He finished as Superboy arched an eyebrow at him. His teammate stepped forward as Garfield clambered into one of the chairs, arms crossed as he scowled at the computer.

"Does that thing say anything more about her? What she did before she left the cave, or how she was acting?" It didn't look like Superboy wasn't convincing the screen to give him any of that information, as Mal shook his head.

"Just that she was looking stressed out about something. Why?" Which didn't stop Superboy from staring at the screen. His voice was rough as he spoke again.

"…She didn't remember me. Or the kid, either. You'd think one of us would've gotten a reaction, but she didn't even blink." His hands clenched into fists, digging into the fabric of his shirt.

"Maybe she was just acting-?"

"She's NOT that good of an actor!" Conner practically snarled out. "And if she was going to try and cover her reaction, surprise would have been more likely. Ch, I'd even expect her to be worried we managed to track her down…But I didn't get any of that from her."

"Okay, okay…Cool the temper, Con." Mal held his hands up, shaking his head. "I know you're stressed about this. But you're not going to get answers by shouting or threatening the computer. Just have a seat and give a report I can file. Maybe then we can figure out what's going on and how to help."

"...I am not stressed. I came here to figure out why she cut and ran. Why she abandoned the team. That's all."

' _So how come you say that like you're really wondering why she left you?'_ For once Gar didn't voice that out loud. Something about the way Superboy's hands kept tensing into fists, and how he glared at the table warned him against speaking. Which left him with feeling his tail curl around his ankle, giving it a brief squeeze.

A hand rested on his shoulder, the grip gentle and reassuring in a way that was close to M'gann's. The voice had a strength and character all it's own though, humming in his ear.

"Don't worry, Gar. Whatever is on your sister's mind, we'll figure it out. And if she needs help fixing something…Well, that's what we're here for, too." Karen spoke quietly, her words reassuring and meant just for him. He could pick out the casual wear she'd draped over her costume, mostly blending into the low light of the hotel room. He probably should have switched to his tough guy 'I can handle this, I'm on a team with Superboy!' act that he'd been working on…But maybe it could wait until after she was done being reassuring.

"Y-yeah. And even Superboy can help?" He asked, giving a cautious (and what he hoped was discreet and sneaky) glance back at the boy of steel.

" **Especially** him. Trust me, he can handle this better-"

"HE also has good hearing." Conner growled, meeting Gar and Karen both eye to eye with a scowl. Gar felt like wilting a little under it, but Karen and Malcolm both met it easily.

"And maybe he could learn not to listen in on other people's talks until they're ready to give their own report." Mal cut in, voice showing a hint of exasperation. "Hey, Karen. You find out anything?"

"Just word back from the cave. The League aren't coming back any time soon…So if her memory is gone, we're not going to have a J'onn J'onzz around to fix it."

"You think that's what it is?" Garfield piped up, looking between Conner and Karen. Superboy gave a low snort, all the muscles in his head reluctantly moving just enough to let him nod.

"…I'm not seeing much else when it comes to answers. Could be that something ambushed her, or…"

"…Or?" Mal pressed, and Conner gave his head a curt shake.

"…Look, we finally found her, even without J'onn. We'll have to figure out how to get her memory up and running without him, too." Karen moved her hand away from Gar, taking a step closer to the table.

"Well, I can give you a hand with that, at least. Karen Beecher has been asking about transferring in and taking a look around…AND I've been seeing about securing some papers for Conner Kent, too. We're both prospective students now, which should give us a chance to work at the problem from several angles."

"Trust you to handle that," Malcolm had a warm note in his voice. Conner simply gave a mumbled, "Yeah…Thanks. If we're going back undercover tomorrow though, I'm going to see about getting some rest."

"Me too!" Gar chimed in, hoping down from his spot on the table and following Conner to the neighboring room. And maybe giving the two love birds a chance to be alone. That was a decent way to say thanks for the help, he decided gallantly.

-o-o-o-

Her hands and knees listened to her. Megan had to pray and beg for them to work, but she managed to hobble her way across the floor to the sofa, and pull herself onto it without another attack. Or hallucination. Or whatever it was that just happened to her; she still didn't have a clear idea on just what, save that she didn't want to experience it again if she had a choice.

Although she might have also faded out of consciousness for a while, because when she came to there was something gripping her shoulder. There was also a hushed voice in her ear repeating "Megan? Megan,"

Her name sounded strange in her head, almost like the sound of it was off, but she blinked her eyes open anyway. And found herself looking up at a pair of blue eyes framed by black hair. 'Conner?' She wanted to say, but what came out instead was a sleepy mumble. While her voice remembered how to work, it gave time for Megan's eyes to focus. Those features hovering overhead solidified and took on some soft edges as she picked out a hushed and clearly female voice.

"You awake now?" Megan's head bobbed up and down in a nod, still resting against the arm of the couch and one of the throw pillows draped over it.

"Y-yeah. Sorry, Wendy…Did you want to use the sofa?" That got her friend's lips to quirk up, as she shook her head.

"No, I'm just trying to figure out why you fell asleep on it instead of a bed." Megan tried to coax her own lips into something close to smile, although it felt only half formed on her face.

"No big reason…I think today just took a lot out of me. Left me drained and tired." Her tongue wanted to tie itself up around those words, stop that lie from ever leaving her mouth…But Megan forced it out anyway. It was a good way of convincing herself that whatever happened wasn't something to worry about. Wasn't worth dwelling on or getting worked up over…And that it hopefully wouldn't happen again.

"Yeah, well," Wendy took a seat on the one part of the couch that Megan wasn't sprawled across, while Megan's legs listened to her enough to curl up against her chest. "I guess it's a big day once you catch the eye of a new boy. I didn't get a good look at who you were talking to…But he seemed interesting."

"Just 'interesting?'" Megan teased, still too exhausted to feel embarrassed…Although her cheeks tried to blush anyway. "I thought you'd have more comments then just that."

"Hey! Like I said, I didn't get a good look at him; busy wrapping up practice. But to be honest…He actually looked a little familiar. Sort of like that boy you used to date in high school, actually."

"O-oh?" Her mouth started to dry up, and Megan licked her lips nervously as that uneasy knot tried to settle back into her thoughts. She didn't want to focus on that, or the blanks and out of focus spots in her memory. Though Wendy's comments weren't much easier to listen to.

"Yeah…Wasn't his name like…Conner or something?" She shut her eyes as she leaned back against the couch arm, not ready to meet Wendy's gaze.

"I…Honestly don't remember what it was. Don't know if the new boy even told me his name." Her lie felt like it wanted to stick in her chest, and she rolled her shoulders to try and dislodge that sensation and heaviness closing in around her. "Sorry."

The name itched in her mind, and no matter how many times she repeated it, Megan couldn't ease it out or put it aside. Conner. Conner. There was something familiar about it, the more she dwelled on the name and Wendy's words. She didn't want to think about it, though; not about familiarity, déjà vu, or half remembered crushes in high school. It had been five years since any of that had happened. Five years busy with…

Busy with…

Megan pulled herself off the couch and took those dozen strides she needed to reach her bedroom and collapse into the bed. She just managed a muttered "bed time" to Wendy before she ducked between the bunks and smashed into the mattress. She wasn't going to focus on any of that.

' _It doesn't matter. None of it matters. It's all in the past,'_ and that meant she didn't need to focus on whatever gaps and glossed over details she could only half remember.

Megan kept repeating that to herself all through what felt like hours of tossing and turning. Even with exhaustion seeping into her bones, sleep was a long time in coming.

-o-o-o-

"Y'know, under cover work or not...This place has some appeal." Karen remarked as she glanced around. Conner just huffed in response, while Gar-As-A-Budgie quirked his head to the side and blinked an eye at the buildings. "I'm just saying it's a nice spot if you want to take a break from super heroics and study instead. Being right on the water front is nice," and gave her a good look at how a gentle blue color had settled over the campus, with the bay air still misting and settled in the sky. "And the course work doesn't look bad either. I wouldn't trade it in for Ivy Town, but-"

"But I don't see what this has to do with the mission." Conner growled, and Karen didn't bother to hide how much her eyes were rolling. "Small talk, Con." And she put a certain relish into using that pet name and watch the corners of his eyes twitch. "It's something normal people do...Which we're supposed to be, by the by. Transfer students, remember?"

"We're supposed to be figuring out what the hell is wrong with our teammate." At least Conner kept his voice low as he growled that out, looking at those same classically designed buildings as if they'd personally offended him. "And confirm the situation. I don't get how we're managing that-"

"Con, Con. One thing at a time; scoping out the area first. THEN locate our target," she wondered how anyone could go with formal and detached mission lingo like that all the time. "And tackle things from there. This is mission oriented stuff, same as anything else."

"...You're just enjoying it." Amazing how he made an observation sound like an accusation as well. Karen simply remarked, "I find its smart to bring a good attitude to work. Helps you stay invested in it...And if my eyes aren't mistaken, we're coming up to the main block of class rooms." She picked them out, ringed around a common that must have gone through several changes of grass each month with how many feet walked over it. "If she's going to have class today, she'll pass through here. So I'll take Gar,"

He settled onto her shoulder as she spoke. "And YOU can work on blending in, instead of doing your best impersonation of a storm cloud." Conner didn't do much with that, giving a rumble in his chest and throat as he stalked off to the other corner of the campus.

"Is he tenser then normal?" Gar chirped in her ear, watching him as they drifted to their positions.

"Could be." Karen said as she pulled out one of the promotional papers, doing her best to look interested in it as she took a seat on the bench. "Maybe it's just that 'campus' sounds too much like 'Cadmus.' I wouldn't bet on anything with him, though." Even though she found herself thinking that he DID seem more twitchy then usual.

"Noted...But what should I do?" That, she had a better answer to. Karen fished out the school map, holding it out so Gar could get a good look at it.

"Pretty simple; do your own investigations from the air. Get an idea for how things should normally be...And if you see M'gann, keep an eye on her too." Gar didn't need any second prompting as he launched himself into the sky with a flurry of wings. Karen leaned back as she watched him fly off, wondering what else the morning had in store for them.

-o-o-o-

When Megan woke up, it was with her heart hammering. As she stared out from between the bunks, she was sure she could catch splotches of red retreating back into the cream colored paintwork on the walls. Her mouth was dry, and her hands quivered as a shiver worked its way deep into her muscles and bones. She managed to comb her fingers through her hair a few times, focusing on pushing the long strands behind her ears as she lifted her head. The motion helped slow her heart down, and clear up her head from…From whatever she'd just woken up from. Nightmares, certainly, but what she couldn't remember the exact details of.

Her heart quivered again, sending a ripple of shudders through her chest as she tried to think back. Which was enough for Megan decided that having her recall fogged might have been for the best. Sleep had done a little good for her legs, as she stretched them out and swung them over the side of the bed. There wasn't any vertigo as she stood up, and she was able to work her way into the bathroom without incident.

Megan didn't look at her reflection as she showered or prepared for the day. That feeling of not-quite-right hadn't been dislodged from her head or her limbs, even with sleep. She kept her eyes fixed on the floor as she dried off and slipped into her clothes (opting for something loose on her skin, to keep from feeling anything pressing or reminding her of how odd she still felt) knowing that looking would make that bout of feeling off even worse. Experience had taught her that much, at least.

' _Just stress.'_ Megan reminded herself. _'College is busy, and you're just worried about keeping on top of your assignments and cheerleading.'_

Keeping that in the front of her mind, she almost went a several hours without tripping over another knot in her thoughts, or having something snag on her attention. At least until she worked her way into the actual campus, and her eyes decided that a clear morning wasn't enough to keep them from imagining things.

On the plus side, the things that caught in the corners of her eyes were fairly tame; no imagined flashes of color or things that plainly didn't belong in the yard or open air passages between the buildings. But there were faces that she thought she almost recognized, and just teased at her memory and the edges of her vision and observation. And it seemed like every time she turned to try and get a better look, she'd missed her chance. Before, going to a large school had seemed like an excellent idea…But just then, as she made her way back to class, it felt a lot more like a hindrance.

That stayed true for the rest of the day. For whatever reason, people with black hair kept catching her eye; a time or two she thought she could catch matching black shirt on some of them, although the sight would vanish into the crowd before she got a second look. That was odd enough…But when a part of her mind decided that a dark skinned girl she kept thinking she caught in the press of students between classes was important, Megan settled in on it being completely and wholly irritating. At least that was a mild thing, she reminded herself, as she turned her head around to try and see if she had really seen a tugging-at-her-memory face in the crowd.

That may have been why she didn't pay as much attention as she should have to what was in front of her. A fact that Megan was swiftly made aware of when a black and brown shape suddenly filled her vision as she turned her eyes back. A second later she was noting how solid the body in front of her was, as she bounced off it with a low 'oof' and fought to keep from overbalancing.

"M-?" The voice in her ears was familiar, and right as she matched the name to it, there was a hand on her shoulder. "Megan?" Conner seemed to struggle with her name for a moment, but continued once it was out of his mouth. "You okay?"

"Fine! I'm fine!" She blurted out, pulling herself upright. "Sorry, was just distracted for a second; didn't mean to bump into you like that." He rolled his shoulders in a shrug, something that she quickly translated into 'don't worry about it.' A second later, she wondered WHY she could translate that so quickly...Right as her thoughts started to scurry and tremble under the focus.

"Hey," she found herself asking through the fog settling in her thoughts, and making her balance feel strangely light. Her words practically floated out. "There's a few more minutes before afternoon classes start, and I'm close enough to my Tectonics study…I was wondering if I could ask you something?" That made some of that fog clear up, especially when he nodded.

"I was…Talking to a friend of mine last night," more like laying half conscious on the couch, but she decided not to bring that up. "And she reminded me that I had a…A friend a lot like you, back in high school."

' _A boyfriend a lot like you, apparently.'_ She wasn't sure what made that thought so difficult to grasp and accept; that she'd forgotten, or how she kept shying away from trying to remember.

She took a deep breath, reminding herself that it was hard for the situation between them to get any more weird. "I'd like to know if I'm imagining things, or if there's something between us. Like…A connection or something. It'd go a long way to explaining how interesting you are, other then those pretty eyes and cute ears." She was shocked at her boldness, and at how easily the comment came to her tongue in sharp contrast to the rest of her words. Almost like she was used to half complimenting and half teasing new boys when it came to cute features. She was tempted to decide that it was just her restless night that was making her tongue careless...But that didn't answer why her heart was so slow to pick up, considering what she'd just said. But at least Conner was a match for her when it came to looking surprised…And a touch off balance, she noted as he shifted from one foot to the other.

"…You think I have cute ears? Really?" He sounded surprised to hear both her words and his own. Megan noted that they also went pink when he fought down a blush, and she couldn't keep from giggling. "That isn't really an answer to my question, Conner Kent."

Conner looked like he was going to say something, but stopped short as his head jerked up and glanced around in a way that made her double take. His eyes were narrowed as they darted around, but must have caught that bewildered look flashing across her face, since he spoke up.

"Did you hear something?"

"Oh, stop it." Megan let a touch of annoyance at him into her words, as well as exasperation at herself. "You're dodging the question again. And it's bad enough that I keep thinking I see-"

Red. Red was in her eyes again. It was bright against the rest of the world and made her heart and words both freeze up. There was a moment where she couldn't breathe, couldn't coax a single thought to form…Until she realized that it wasn't the rusted color that had invaded her dorm room, but a bright scarlet that was filling her eyes, and pulling them towards Conner's chest. There was something scrawled across it that she _knew_ wasn't there before, almost blood red against the black of his shirt.

"Hey, are you-" There might have been an 'okay' at the end of that question, but it was all growing murky in her ears. All around her the campus began to blur out, faces going indistinct and fading into a haze around her…Save for the one right in front of her and trying to capture and hold her eyes. Megan blinked, refocused, and for a heartbeat there was a softness to his face as his lips gave up a brief, slight smile. The haze in her head turned warm as she watched, and she could feel herself smiling back as something wrapped around her waist and pulled her close. And she could feel something pressing against her lips for the briefest moment-

The sensations all broke to pieces as a scream grated across the insides of ears, a burst of thunder and a howl that felt like it came from inside her head instead of from around her...And it sent Megan staggering back as her senses all swam and whatever she'd been looking at blurred out. And the shriek kept digging into her mind, a long wail of pain.

It wasn't in words. But her heart started pounding as distress was pushed into her, along with something that screamed for help. But beyond that, there was an undercurrent trying to wash over that cry; strong, dangerous...Her shoulders twitched, and everything blurred around her into something new. There was a flicker of a pair of eyes with a pale pitiless light to them, and flashes of something red and black trembling under that gaze and shuddering from some unseen blows...Somehow, she knew the scream was coming from that collection of colors. It made her skin twitch as Megan tried to blink and chase those clashing images out of her head.

The cry cut out, flinched away from her head as Megan was suddenly wrapped up in the impression of something curling up defensively, clambering into some cave to lick its wounds.

' _Stop-'_ She urged all of those things, right as something crashed through the layers of confusion that were building up in her mind. It was a sound, harsh and clanging as it shattered that low thrum of blood in her ears. The class bell was loud in her ears, shattering her focus and chasing away that uneasy prickle between her shoulder blades…Although Megan could swear that just beyond those metallic echoes and notes, she could hear a faint, nasty chuckle.

 _"Almost found you..."_ Her hand shot up to her head as the voice whispered, just audible on the edges of her thoughts. Her fingers shook as they ran over her forehead, trying to ease whatever that was out. Her breath came out in a shudder that finally pulled her back onto the campus lawn. Grass flooded back into her vision, and Megan fixated on that instead...Not on that same green that still seemed intent on sticking to her hands and in the corners of her eyes.

"I-I should get going," she spoke over all those sounds, letting the words act as an anchor to drown out the remnants of noise in her head. "I'm going to be late for class." When she opened her eyes again, Conner's shirt was back to being blank and dark…While his expression was dark and conflicted as he listened to her.

"You're not okay." A part of her bristled at that, and for a moment it looked like he was going to stop her from leaving; raising an arm to touch her on the shoulder, but he cut the motion short as she pulled away from him.

"I'll be fine. I've just been a little short on sleep lately, is all." Which would explain why her mind kept leading her down those twists and turns. It was better then thinking she was losing it, at least. Megan gave Conner the briefest glance as she turned towards the building…But kept her eyes fixed only on his face, and not once glancing back at his shirt, just to be safe.

' _I'm really getting worn out,'_ she thought again as she made a dash for the classroom. _'Whoever heard of green skin, anyway? Or...The rest of that.'_ Which she did NOT want to dwell on.

"Maybe…I'll see you later, again. But I need to be going." He didn't stop her, and her feet were quick to carry her away. It only then occurred to her, as she pushed aside the doors and hurried inside, that she'd never gotten that answer on if she knew him or was overlooking something between them. And that, in a way that made a bitter taste settle on her tongue, she wasn't as eager or interested in finding out as she was before.

Or how it felt that she was the one running away from him, this time. And from something else, still lurking in the back of her mind.

-o-o-o-

He was letting her get away again. But at the same time, running after her didn't sound like a smart idea, even for him. He hadn't even meant to bump into her so soon after that first meeting, but they'd somehow managed to collide anyway.

And then just like that she was gone again, still leaving him without any answers. There hadn't even been a hint of telepathy from her, either; nothing that was like the touches he'd been so used to before…

The thought made a spark flare back up in his head, and he let it grow into full on anger; his hands balled up into fists and he found himself glaring at the sidewalk she'd been standing on a second ago…And all of it was better then standing there and feeling lost and confused.

Or thinking something as stupid as wanting to hear her voice in his head again.

"So, you learn anything?" Karen's voice slid into his hearing easily, the same way she walked up beside him with a smooth gait; his teammate looked like she belonged here a lot more then he did, from the way she relaxed and balanced a set of books under one arm. Karen remained standing beside him after she spoke, watching as the red head retreated back into the safety of the school buildings. Five steps, and the interior had swallowed her up in a blaze of reflected light on the glass doors, and shadows from inside the building.

"Just that there's something wrong, and I could of told you that from the start. There's something wrong with her memory, definitely…" Conner let his breath out in a sigh. "…And it looks like she really doesn't know anything about us. I talked to her again, but nothing that she recognized."

"Weird," Karen murmured, frowning at that set of doors Megan had vanished into. Conner simply nodded, wondering where they were supposed to go from there. He fiddled with his ears as he thought for a good five seconds, before Conner realized what he was doing and stopped with an angry huff of breath.

Just over that he could hear a whistle of feathers moving through the air, as Beast Boy touched down on Karen's shoulder. "Beast Boy, reporting in!"

"Nice. So what's the word from you, Gar?" The kid did a little shuffle step on Karen's shoulder, his beak turning towards the roofs. "Well...I did what you said. Scouted the area...But to be honest, I didn't think schools would be like this."

"Like what?" Conner cut in, unable to keep his eyes from scanning the same patch of buildings as Gar.

"Well...There's something odd with the people around the edges of the campus. And...I thought I picked out her ship." That made him raise an eyebrow, and press the topic.

"What do you mean 'thought?'"

"Well, it was just for a second; I was flying over the roofs, and I saw something blur on one of them. Like something on it was getting switched on and off. And I thought for a second I could see red and black. Different from the tiles on the roof...But I'm not sure where it was."

"...And?" Conner prompted again. He could see how Gar was keeping his eyes fixed ahead.

"And...Sorry, I couldn't find it again. But I really thought there was something wrong when I saw it. Since when do Bio-Ships flicker on and off like that, anyway?"

 _'Only if something's gone really wrong.'_ Conner thought to himself as he shook his head. "I'm wondering why it's even here; is it just sticking around to be with M'gann?" _'Even though she doesn't remember it?'_ The thought was trying to push his anger to a boiling point, and his next words were more of a growl then anything else.

"I don't know…Maybe I'm imagining things," while that growl in his voice supplied 'not likely' "but I keep thinking there's stuff here that doesn't belong in a college."

"What…Sort of things?" Karen tried to glance around discreetly as she spoke.

"People talking in something other then English, for one thing. I know we're on the East coast, but it still sounded weird…Although I couldn't pick out any of the words over all of the crowd noise."

"Not just him," Gar's voice chirped in as well, as he glanced back at the two. "There's some people hanging around the edges of campus that REALLY look like they don't belong here. It's…Not like they're wearing ninja suits or anything, but I didn't like how they were acting. I could look down at them from the air, and they weren't really moving the same way students or teachers were. They didn't look like they fit in here anymore then Superboy does-"

"I fit in a hell of a lot better then a green talking parakeet." Conner snapped, while Gar protested "I'm a BUDGIE!"

"Boys, boys. Settle down." Karen cut in, giving her shoulder a gentle roll to ruffle Gar's feathers and have him spend time smoothing them out. "Good observations, though; and something we'd better keep in mind and detail with Mal back at the hotel. Sounds more and more like we need less intel gathering, and more of a game plan." He had to nod at that, at least. The back of his neck was still prickling from those fragments of words…And while they were growing distant, something about the language bothered him.

"We should have brought Wolf," Conner muttered, glancing around again.

"Con, he's giant white mutant wolf; he'd stand out if you brought him to a college campus, and the idea here is to be covert." Karen's tone allowed for no argument on that point. "Besides, if we really need a dire wolf, that's what Gar is here for." Gar said nothing, but puffed his feathers out and squinted his eyes enough to look as smug as was possible for a budgie.

"…He's an Indian wolf." Conner felt the need to sullenly point out and correct. "Dire is a completely separate and extinct species." Karen lost that severe look long enough to give a quick chuckle and shake her head.

"Fine, fine, Indian wolf. Point still stands, though. What are you so nervous about, anyway?"

"I don't do nervous," although that didn't keep his eyes from darting around again as he thought he caught something in the corner of his vision, and heard another snatch of words, distorted from the distance but in a growled and sharp tongue. "I just want to be prepared for whatever happens."


	4. Fever Dreams

' _It's fine. Everything is fine.'_ Once the drone of class lectures were over, Megan kept that mantra of a thought running through her head. It helped drown out any leftover anxiety trying to coat her tongue and make her throat go tight, and fill gaps in her head that she didn't want to focus on.

' _Things are fine.'_ She'd written out more notes then usual, had kept her thoughts bent on keeping her pen moving over anything else. As such, Megan found herself with more information then she thought was possible on Mars and its relation to Earth…And she found herself trying not to think on any of that, either. Just that things were and would be fine, once she got back to the dorm and gave her mind a chance to rest. Afterwards, once she had her feet back under her, she could maybe focus on the variable distance between the two planets or the amount of iron oxide in soil without feeling something scratching at the back of her thoughts.

' _Focus on that later. Right now, sleep.'_ Megan wrenched her thoughts back towards getting to her room, and the bed waiting for her. Overhead, the sky was only just beginning to change as the sun dipped towards the horizon, and Megan allowed herself time to admire the colors in the sky. She wasn't planning on staying awake to appreciate them for long, though; an early rest sounded more appealing then staying awake for anything, at that point.

She shivered as she moved through the campus and towards her dorm, running her hands along her arms. It felt like there was a chill settling over the entire area, pushing out that warm front they'd been enjoying for the last week. By the time she stepped into the hall leading to her room, that shiver had embedded itself in her back and her arms, and she ducked her head as she hurried along the passages. Her eyes were half closed, worried on what she'd see if she did open them-

' _Don't think like that. Things are FINE.'_ She punctuated that thought by pushing open the door and stepping inside. Wendy glanced up when she stumbled in, which Megan figured out more from how a chair squeaked against the carpet then from what she saw.

"Megan?" Wendy's voice was clouded over with…It sounded a lot like worry, although Megan couldn't tell why; as she kept repeating to herself, things were fine. "What's wrong?"

' _Nothing,'_ she wanted to say, but instead replied with "Just tired…Again." While she still wasn't looking at Wendy, Megan could practically hear the disbelief in the other girl's expression.

"Even after last night? Are you SURE you're sleeping well?" Wendy stood up as she spoke, while Megan let the door swing closed behind her. Stepping inside, she thought she could breathe a little easier, although it apparently didn't do much to convince Wendy. "Or that you're okay? You're shaking all over."

It felt like she'd stepped into the middle of winter, or something worse. She could never remember any snowfall on campus being this bad, or having such a chilling bite to it. "It's a little cold," Megan admitted, and when she convinced her eyes to fully open, found herself blinking up at a pair of confused eyes. "Actually, it feels really cold."

"Megan…What are you talking about? It's in the seventies inside and outside; it's been the same for the last few days." She could feel a hand against her forehead, as Wendy frowned at her. "You don't feel like you have a fever…"

"I just need to sleep," Megan repeated, both for Wendy and for herself. "I should be better once I get that…Although if I could borrow an extra blanket from you, I'd be really grateful."

-o-o-o-

"Looking more grim then usual, Conner." Karen noted as he trudged down the sidewalk, eyes fixed straight ahead. Superboy's answer was to roll his shoulders and never break his gaze from where the path was leading them.

"I'm allowed to look grim; this is supposed to be a stressful situation with changing colleges, anyway."

"…Point," she admitted with another low laugh hiding behind her words. And which had the effect of making his scowl deepen, as he gave the mixture of concrete and stones that made up the campus sidewalk a strong glare. Although where that path was leading them, he still couldn't exactly tell…Although he had a few guesses.

"We're getting close to the waterfront," Conner noted out loud, letting the taste from the precipitation in the air linger on his tongue. The smell from water saturating the air was also thick when he breathed in, and he had the feeling that in a few more hours it would change to fog. Gar was already puffing up his feathers as his head kept darting around. Conner was glad that he at least was keeping his mouth shut...Which was naturally right when Beast Boy decided it was time to fill in the silence with some conversation.

"So, Superboy...You think sis is enjoying it here?" He just huffed out in response, hoping that would be a sign that he wasn't interested in continuing the dialogue. Gar didn't take the hint. "I mean, it's nice, but I'd think she'd enjoy being with us more-"

"It's none of my business." They weren't together anymore; SHE'D made that clear once she ran off. "I'm here to do a job and get her back in the team. That's all." Definitely not moon over her or wish things were different.

 _'I didn't have any choice. She was too-'_ His thoughts caught up on that, and for a heartbeat they tried to slip 'uncomfortable' into place, until he fought the entire idea down and covered it up with other words. _'Reckless to be around.'_ Even that left a knot trying to form between his shoulders, leaving them twitching as Gar fanned his wings for balance.

"Okay, noted...But I figured you might know something? Doesn't it just seem weird that she'd abandon-"

"Karen, you know where we're going?" Conner plowed over the words in a near snap. Gar's last word still stung at his ears as he fixed his eyes ahead, not even glancing at the kid. _'It's nothing like that.'_ He felt the red from the S-shield hidden inside his shirt brush against his skin as a breeze ruffled through the fabric, doing little to help his temper.

"...Fine, fine. Sheesh, you act like you don't care about her at all." Conner simply grumbled, hoping that Gar couldn't pick out 'I'm not supposed to' underneath that. Instead, he kept his attention on Karen as she nodded and replied "We should be there soon..."

"And you're sure this is where she's supposed to be?"

"Yeah...Mal's sources said that she's at the Steven's dorm, and when I asked for directions, everyone pointed me this way. So it's got to be here somewhere." Karen frowned down at her own papers, giving them a look that said they had _better_ be accurate, for their own sake. "Although I'm trying to imagine where they'd fit a building on this waterline-"

She trailed off as they approached the harbor, and Conner found himself looking forward as well. Not a lot in the way of buildings out here, just like Karen said…But they were left with staring at a large, dormitory sized boat. It was moored next to the docks with gangplanks leading up onto it, and nearly every window was lit up. In the fading light he could just make out the words "SS Stevens" painted on the hull. Karen let her breath out slow, shaking her head.

"Wow, she just doesn't have it in her to pick out someplace normal to live."

"I think it looks cool." Gar provided as he fluttered onto Conner's shoulder. And while a few spare bits of data filtered into Superboy's thoughts and onto his words.

"S.S Stevens…Used to be a cruise ship, which had in turn been refitted from a warship. It was purchased in 1968, and has since been remodeled several times, and was almost retired in 1975…Although advancements in technology and a generous contribution from something called the Sirianni Foundation…What?" He trailed off when he saw the sideways glance Karen was giving him. Gar was also somehow managing, with the way he canted his head to the side and stared at Conner over his beak.

"So. You're still the human encyclopedia like you were in high school. Good to know." Karen finally said, filling in the gap and earning a snort from Conner as he glanced back over the boat-dormitory. He did have to admit…It did somehow seem like a match for M'gann. That might have just been the cheery whitewash it had, which had a faint pink glow from the setting sun. Karen moved closer to him, her eyes scanning the windows and the outlines that moved behind them.

"By the by…Can you pick out anyone that looks like her?"

"Wouldn't that be…" He trailed off, uncertain how to phrase it, while Gar helpfully offered "Peeping?" and earning a flick from Karen's fingers along the feathers of his head.

"No, because I'm not asking you to look too closely…And if you do, trust me, I'll KNOW." 'And my vengeance will be swift and terrible' her voice told him. The best response seemed to be avoid any spoken words, and just follow her suggestion…And doing a sudden double taking as he picked out a flash of red hair, moving through one of the windows.

"Yeah…I think I saw her, there." He pointed towards the room, right as someone that looked more and more like Megan moved towards the window…And dropped the shades. He thought he could pick out her outline dropping out of sight (and hopefully into a bed) in exhaustion, while Karen gave a quick nod.

"Alright, so that's a double confirmation. Nice." The sun dropped down past the horizon completely as she spoke, taking most of the color and light with it.

"So, we know where she is…What now?" His feet felt like they wanted to move up the stairs and towards the entrance, or just throw himself straight up into the air and forget using the stairs entirely; the deck of the boat was easily in 'single bound' distance, as Wally used to put it. But before his legs had time to do more then twitch, Karen's hand fell on his shoulder and rested next to where Gar was perched.

"Now, we should probably give Malcolm a call. Or talk to him in person; it's enough that we've confirmed there's a location that matches the intelligence…And chances are we'll get a chance to talk to Meg soon enough, either here or in class."

"I could talk to her now…" Conner found himself offering, even as Karen shook her head.

"Conner, I get being concerned for her, but…Well for one, we need to keep from being too obvious about this. And second, you've already seen her a couple of times. How about if I give it a try, next time? She hasn't had the best reaction to you, but maybe I'll have better luck." He wanted to shrug her hand off, to argue the point…Before quickly realizing how attached he was getting to this mission. It shouldn't have been a big deal who helped her remember, he reminded himself-

' _But you still want to help her.'_ The thought slid into place, and a part of him was secretly glad that M'gann apparently didn't have it in her to read thoughts. He tried to bury all of that by giving a short, terse nod and grumbled, "Fine."

His voice was low as he muttered that…Which may have been why he picked something out at the edges of his hearing; like a scrape of boots and a whirr of something getting thrown, followed by a muffled metallic clang. For a moment, he thought 'Robin?' before remembering that both Tim and the previous name holder were operating well outside of where they were.

"Something's wrong. Look at the sides of the boat," he snapped out, already feeling his shoulders tense up as he turned his head to fully focus on those sounds; there were a few more of them, and all centered on where Stevens was moored.

He narrowed his eyes, letting the color seep out of his vision and focus on those shadows running up and down the sides of the ship…And as he watched, they lost their blackness. Instead, he could pick out bright dots of heat scaling the walls.

"Hey…Those don't look like a normal part of college life…" Gar trailed off, and Conner felt the weight on his shoulder increase as the words trailed off into a low growl. His eyes flickered over long enough to see that there was something that looked like a green serval digging its claws into his shoulder, eyes flared wide open and showing teeth at what was climbing up the sides of the boat. Conner was pretty certain the kid was right; what he could pick out said that there were easily seven, and all carrying something that looked uncomfortably like a heavy class gun…And moving towards what looked a lot like M'gann's room. Beast Boy gave an angry hiss, backing up what Conner saw.

"Bumblebee-" He started to say, but she was already dashing ahead of him as she spoke.

"Okay…Cancel that. I'm going to see if I have better luck NOW. Watch my back; I'm getting her out." Bumblebee didn't give him a chance to respond, already running for the door. Superboy felt adrenaline already starting to snap through his veins…But his feet, somehow, stayed rooted to the ground as he watched.

-o-o-o-

A part of her knew she was dreaming, and dreaming in a way that made her twist and tangle up in those bed sheets Megan was faintly aware of, all while she coated her skin with sweat. But that part of her thoughts, and even the feel of the real world were drowned out as she ran through her dreamscape; as she sprinted, the pounding of her heart and stitch in her side muffled those other sensations. And left her consumed by the murky, blurred out landscape she was charging through. Red again, rust colored, and Megan shut her eyes as she stumbled along. Though if she'd kept them open, she might have seen whatever caught her foot and sent her tumbling forward. When Megan hit the ground, it jolted her eyes back open.

She found herself staring up at what looked like a red egg, curled up out of sight on a campus roof; she could see a mirror of the sky from that afternoon stretching overhead, and pick out the campus sounds drifting up from below. As she watched, Megan got the impression that the device was looking at her as well...And somehow, from the low thrum in the air coming off of the object, she also got an impression of loneliness. It was like there were tendrils curling off the egg and trying to thread and weave back into her head, like puzzle pieces trying to fit back together-

The connection cut off as something scoured across the device's surface, opening long rents and turning that gentle touch into panicked, desperate clutch at her thoughts. Trying not to drown and screaming for Megan to HELP it from whatever was doing that to her-

 _'How do I know it's a her?'_ Megan wondered in the back of her mind as she scrambled to her feet and flinched away from the thing. She only had a split second to realize her foot had slipped off the edge of the roof, before the rest of her body followed with a shriek as she plummeted off the building. The egg dropped out of sight, but she could still hear it trying to curl away from whatever was attacking it, begging her to come back and help.

The vision stopped with a jolt that slammed the breath out of her, leaving Megan staring up into blackness. The campus was gone, without even a hint of the brick buildings. Her eyes strained, searching for something to latch onto...But a small part of her felt relieved when she found nothing, just staring into a dark void.

"We've found traces," a voice echoed around her, muffled and sounding like she was hearing it from the bottom of a well. That small and formerly relieved part of her sent her heart back into hammering, and her hands straining against the ground as she listened. "The ship has been spotted-"

The darkness was leeched out overhead, and Megan could just pick out faint outlines towering over her, looming and imposing. She couldn't see any faces...But something about their voices, hard and pitiless, made her hope that meant they couldn't see her either.

"I can take care of the problem." A new voice moved in...And something about it left her throat dry. Maybe it was that skin crawling smugness in the tone, or how it never fluctuated above something that sounded like a sneer put into words. "Let me search. I'll find her eventually...And return some of her treatment." The echoes faded out, before a red flare of pain tore through her head. She could hear that almost-scream from before, as the red egg tried to latch onto her for help before suddenly closing itself off and leaving Megan scrambling to her feet.

She didn't want to touch any of this; hallucinations, nightmares...Whatever they were, the contact left her with an oily feeling that made her skin crawl. Drowning out everything that tried to tell her she was still dreaming as she bolted through the dreamscape, which had red and orange slowly seeping and staining back into it.

Something dark was following her, outline large and athletic whenever she caught a glimpse when she turned her head. Megan could just catch a glimpse of black hair matching a black shirt, but she didn't let her eyes stay on whoever it was for long. Somehow she knew that if the figure caught up to her, or if she looked for too long, she'd break; shatter into a thousand pieces that she couldn't possibly recover from. As it was, she felt fragile and weak.

So instead she ran. Refused to let whoever it was catch up with her...Or catch her and hold her long enough for that hurt to blossom out from her chest; whether they wanted that or not, she KNEW that would be the end result. And that somehow made the outline worse then that voice from before. She ducked into a passage that yawned open, barreling down the hallway as the passage got more and more narrow. With how bulky her pursuer was, she was certain he wouldn't be able to follow through a space like this.

The walls were closing in around her with each step. Becoming harsh, hard, stained a sandstone red that was different from the bricks of the campus, and she couldn't find a way through them. The stone bit at her shoulders as she tried to squeeze through...But instead she found herself stuck and struggling between two slabs of harsh, rust colored stone, so tight that she couldn't even get a full breath.

"M-" a voice started to say, and her head yanked back around to stare at a pair of blue eyes, so bright they seemed to cut into her. _'No,'_ she wanted to say and pull away, but the rock kept her stuck fast. _'No, you can't follow me, you COULDN'T have followed me-'_

The words all died in her throat as she saw those eyes go soft, which did nothing for the pain radiating out through her chest. Her hands went up to cover her eyes and try to block out what she saw and felt. Instead, she found herself staring at white, colorless skin. Her heart screamed confusion in her ears as she looked at her fingers. There was a twitch trying to work through them, sending her skin to squirming. Megan struggled, her feet scrabbling at the ground as she tried to push herself free. She only stopped when something rose about the roar of her pulse... And that pitiless voice cut at her ears. And this time she wasn't overhearing; it was speaking to HER.

_"It took effort to find you, with how you muffled your presence. But haven't you learned that if you look into MY head I can find you? Even if it's just in your dreams? That distress call your ship sent you only helped the search. You've grown careless, Martian-"_

Megan jolted awake, breathing hard as something boomed through her ears again. It took her a second to realize that whatever it was, was also way too loud to just be her heartbeat.

"Hang on already," over the pounding as her pulse kept trying to deafen her, Megan could pick out Wendy speaking as she moved towards the door-

' _Oh.'_ Something about the realization helped her heart slow down by a few beats, and free up her hand to wipe off some of the sweat sticking to her bangs and forehead. It was just someone knocking on the door; although what business brought anyone to their door that late at night, she didn't know. Her eyes darted over to the clock on her nightstand, picking out the glowing numbers of 10 followed by 30, and rolled over enough to push herself up and look out through the bedroom doorway. Through her sleep fogged eyes, Megan could just pick out her roommate opening the door up…And her eyes widening in surprise at someone on the other side.

"Karen!?" That got Megan to bolt upright completely, staring and blinking to clear her vision. The girl Wendy led in through the door certainly looked like she could be a match for-

' _High school?'_ Something about that made her head hurt as she watched the new girl returning the hug Wendy gave her, smiling. There did feel like there was something familiar about her, too; much like when she'd first met up with Wendy and had that spark kick start a few of her memories. But for some reason, her thoughts were more sluggish as she tried to focus on them…Although Megan reminded herself that could have just been due to exhaustion. That reasoning didn't ease up the nervous knot in her stomach, though.

"What are you even doing here!? It's been ages!" Wendy chattered over Megan's worry, face bright and grinning as she pulled apart long enough to give Karen a good once over. "New look for you; got to say, I like it."

"Thanks, hon. You're not looking too bad yourself, either; college life looks like it's treating you okay." Looking at her, Megan could vaguely remember someone giving her kind words and advice on cheerleading. Her head continued to pound when she tried to press that, though, while her forehead tried to put on a new coat of perspiration. "And, I've been thinking of transferring here for my studies. Sorry for the late call, but it took me forever to get through the tour, find out where you were…And figuring out that you're apparently living on a boat." That laugh in her voice was familiar, though.

"Anyways, I figured I should at least try to see you! And…Megan is a roommate of yours too, right? Where is she?" Her feet were already swinging out from under the covers as she listened, the day clothing she'd fallen asleep in feeling wrinkled against her body, and Megan drifted towards the doorway. By the time she heard her name, she was already resting a hand on the frame to steady herself. Something about her feet felt curiously light, and her fingers pressed against the wood grain and plaster in an attempt to pull all her thoughts and balance back down to earth as she cleared her throat.

"H-here, too. Was just trying to get some sleep." Karen's face softened when she saw Megan, although there was a moment where Megan was sure she saw something flash across the other girl's face. Something that put her uncomfortably in mind of the Conner boy; it was that same searching, focused look…But it vanished quick enough as she continued.

"Oh! Well, sorry to wake you up, Megan. But if you're up for it, how about some fresh air?"

"This late?" Wendy saved her the effort of staring at Karen, who had an awkward grin in place.

"Yeah, I guess it is kind of late. But I was just thinking it would be nice to catch up with you two while I look around." Wendy didn't look all that convinced, and Megan didn't feel all that different. Even Karen looked like she was nervous with asking that question, although Megan couldn't grasp why.

-o-o-o-

"Come on, come on..." Conner's hands tensed and relaxed in time to the words. With how fast he was muttering, his fingers were constantly as fists. They mainly varied between being bunched up completely, or just a few joint twitches away from being ready to punch. With his eyes narrowed he could just pick out Karen speaking, and he wanted to scream at her to forget small talk and just pull M'gann and Wendy both out of harm's way.

The figures in black weren't hesitating the same way...Although their progress HAD slowed. They'd gone from swarming up the side of the boat to hanging off the cords. He had to fight against the urge to leap forward and sever those strings and send the figures plummeting, as well as screaming for someone to look outside a window and notice what was going on.

Conner had been certain that he'd learned something about patience in the last five years. But standing outside with a green cat on his shoulder was testing the limits of his discipline. It didn't help that there were still those figures climbing up, and he found himself repeating "come on" under his breath until it turned into a mantra. Gar didn't seem much more relaxed, digging his claws into his shoulder as his paws tensed. But hopefully Karen would be out with Megan and her friend soon-

There was motion darting up the ship's side, while Karen, M'gann and Wendy all stubbornly stayed in place. He could see Karen motioning towards somewhere other then the window, but even that didn't seem like enough. Not when the figures were moving again, twisting towards the window with the three, and-

"Dammit-!" Conner snapped out, realizing just what the pause had been for. Time for the figures to start aiming.

-o-o-o-

"Look, girls," Karen swallowed as she spoke, eyes darting towards the window. "Could we just-"

That was when the windows decided, all on their own it seemed, to turn into a hail of shards with a shriek and an explosion that knocked Megan onto her side. Wendy was screaming, while Karen was shouting at them to do _something_ …Megan couldn't pick out what, from where she lay prone on the floor and felt adrenaline starting to buzz into her bloodstream. The smell of burning gunpowder cut into her nose, while her ears rang and throbbed hard enough that Megan was surprised they weren't bleeding. Her nails dug into her palms when she realized that was gunfire. Splashed over all of that, the sound the bullets made as they shrieked through the air was hard and sharp against her ears.

And somehow, it all felt familiar; like she'd been through this and worse, before. A different part of her thought that she should be joining Wendy in crying out and letting panic lance through her, but her head had other plans. Instead something felt like it was crackling, scratching at the edges of her thoughts and pushing any panic out. That weightless feeling was back in her limbs as well, although they also felt clumsy and numb, not listening to her as she tried to pull herself back to her feet.

It felt like someone was running an electric current from the base of her neck and straight through her brain, from how her thoughts crackled. Her skin was burning right in time to those pulses of energy, feeling too tight, not containing anything right; not her bones, not even her thoughts as they strained and tried to push outward.

Looking up, she could see Karen pushing Wendy aside and flipping over their study table as something black and menacing climbed through the shattered remains of the window. Papers joined those glass shards in scuttling across the floor from the draft whipping through the room. Wendy was already diving behind the table, eyes still wide and staring, while Karen tried to reach for Megan and get her behind that scant bit of cover. Karen's lips were moving, but the words were drowned out as a hum settled in Megan's ears; from how her mouth was moving it could have been something like 'hurry' or 'duck,' but Megan's feet moved so slowly and felt almost stuck to the ground. Her head couldn't convince them to move faster, couldn't seem to even work right as that fog and lightheaded feeling soaked into her thoughts...And all while the black figure leveled a gun on them, and the drone in her ears rose until everything else was buried under that high pitched buzz of white noise.

She wouldn't be fast enough, Megan realized. And she wasn't sure if even that table, thick as it was, would provide much protection when she saw just how big the barrel on that assault rifle was. And it was leveling on them, as the attacker began to square his shoulders and squeezed at the trigger.

' _No!'_ She stretched a hand towards the table, eyes wanting to close before those bullets found her body-

But they never did. Not when the table flew across the room with a strange buzz, and smashed into the gunman. He went down as the wood splintered and crackled, body going slack and the gun dropping from suddenly nerveless hands. Megan blinked over at Karen, staring and wondering how she'd managed to throw the table…Only to see that Karen was crouched over Wendy, trying to shield her with her body. And in no position to have pushed or thrown anything.

' _What-?'_ Megan had time to think through the haze, before she heard something else making its way over the window and into the room.


	5. M'orzz The Monster

Conner paced up and down the dock edge, ignoring how Gar dug his claws into his shirt and growled. He was ready to do some growling of his own as he tensed up and kept his eyes fixed on the dormitory. Karen had to get them out soon, he knew-

Or, the windows might opt to shatter instead, and open the room up so he could hear the screams inside. His feet weren't touching the ground in the next heartbeat, and he heard Gar giving an angry yowl as he tried to cling onto his shoulder. Wind was rustling through his hair, and he could feel the beginnings of that ocean fog pressing against his face as he leapt through it.

Right towards that shattered window, and the chaos leaking out of it. He heard something breaking in a hail of splinters as he approached…And then he saw M'gann standing, dazed and in the path of gunfire as more of those shadows dropped in through the window. He was just aware of Karen and another girl struggling to get to their feet, as his vision started to go red when he saw the guns.

Beast Boy dropped off his shoulder, and he heard a snarl tear through the air a second before something massive and green barreled into one of the soldiers. He could see fangs and a brush tail, and for a moment thought _'Wolf'_ before he picked out the green fur. Gar kept the soldier pinned under his new shape, still growling and leaving Conner with the other two attackers.

The first was close enough for him to snap a hand out and snatch the soldier around the windpipe. It took every ounce of training, control, and ethics that had been drilled into him to not squeeze tighter and crush the man's throat for what could have happened to M'gann and the others. But he managed to keep his fingers just loose enough, and that also freed up his feet to move. He could hear the other soldier trying to level his gun, but by then Conner was spinning on his heel and throwing his opponent. When the two crashed together, it was hard enough to leave a dent in the wall. And made it clear that neither of them were getting up.

Karen was rushing over to him the second the fight died down, but Conner held up a hand as he turned his head. It was a faint sound, barely audible over Gar's snarls and the plaster crumbling off the wall…But he was pretty sure he could hear more footsteps on the walls outside.

"…I think there's more coming." Karen blanched at that, shaking her head.

"Okay, that's not good at all. I don't want another firefight breaking out where there's students and noncombatants. What are we supposed to-" She didn't get any further, when a siren blared through the room. Conner clapped his hands over his ears to give them time to adjust, and in the corner of his eyes he saw Garfield burying his head under his paws in a wince. And, just behind him, a familiar face standing the doorway. Black hair, blue eyes...The name 'Wendy' finally clicked into place.

"Maybe you evacuate them?" Wendy offered, glancing at the fire alarm, just visible in the hallway outside. "Nice as it is to have an old friend and a tall dark and broody familiar face rescuing us…And…His…Green wolf." Wendy hesitated, glancing between him and Gar before she recovered herself. "I thought I should do something to save myself. And the rest of the dorm."

"Not bad-" He started to say, before something bounced off his skin with an angry buzzing noise, followed by several more metal pellets ricocheting off his skin. And even with her calm statement, that didn't keep Wendy from ducking back to the floor with terrified squeak as the gunfire echoed through the room with enough noise to put even the fire alarm to shame.

That had the effect of getting Gar back up on all four feet, though. And Conner knew that he should have been moving just as fast as the kid; Gar was already rushing the attackers, and he needed to be up front and fighting as well…But instead his eyes caught on M'gann. Still standing there, looking confused and almost feverish. Somehow not processing what was going on, even though Wendy had enough common sense to get away from the line of fire; the same wasn't true for his former teammate, though. Her eyes were staring straight ahead at something-

Soldiers. He could see more of them in the corner of his eyes, beyond either his or Garfield's reach. And he didn't want to think about what they could do with those guns once they figured out how to fire around him.

"M'gann-" that sneaked out of his mouth before he could think about it, as he fought over what to tell her; to get down, or duck behind something, or SOMEHOW get out of the way. But she wasn't doing any of that; just standing still, her eyes going unfocused as she lifted her hands to try and shield herself-

A strangled, muffled cry made him jerk his head around in time to see their attackers getting lifted into the air…And then promptly flung and shoved back out through the window. Just in the corner of his eye, he could see M'gann's hand stretched out again. And as he turned to look at her, she staggered back against the wall. There was sweat beading on her forehead, and she drew her hand back against her chest, like she was afraid of doing anything else with it as she sunk towards the ground.

"GO, get her out of here!" Karen yelled across the room, already pulling Wendy to her feet. "BB and I can handle Wendy; you get her away before more of those creeps show up!" He didn't have time to argue. And M'gann didn't fight as he closed the distance and pulled her up by the shoulders. She trailed behind him as they bolted out of the doorway, into a maze of a building on the other side. The hallway branched out long in either direction, with no windows to help orient him. Conner swung to the left and pulled her along, trying to find something other then a dorm door. Which were already opening as the alarm continued to blare. Students were spilling out, and he already knew that he didn't want either of them to get caught up in the panic of an evacuation. Or risk going out into the open with the rest of them, since it seemed like M'gann was a prominent target that didn't need to get thrown outside and into a pack of civilians.

Which didn't leave him with a lot of options.

"...Right, stairs." He told himself. One thing at a time, with getting out of trouble and out of the line of fire at the top of the list. Except that he still couldn't figure out where the stairs WERE. This, Conner quickly realized, was the disadvantage of going in through the window; he had no idea where anything else was.

"S-stairs are on your next right." M'gann stuttered in his ear, stumbling along after him. When he heard that, Conner gave up on simply guiding her, and pulled her into his arms as he made a desperate dash for the door she'd pointed out. His breath came a little easier when he found the stairs behind it, even though he charged up them two at a time.

"Come on, come on…" That mantra made its way back onto his tongue as they made it to the second floor. The siren wasn't blaring in his ears like before, and when his feet hit the landing, the sound cut out completely. He strained his ears and eyes to see if he could pick out anything, and stopped short as he picked up something from the far end of the hallway. It didn't sound like a student from how heavy those footfalls were, and he felt his hands bunched into fists.

' _Priority is getting her out of harm's way…'_ And not into another open fight, no matter what she'd pulled off before. He made up his mind by moving towards a door in the hall that looked less like a dorm room and more like a lounge. He eased it open, and then shut as they stepped through and took a few more muffled, hurried steps into the room.

It was murky inside, and even harder to pick things out when the door swung shut. He could make out windows ringing the far wall, but almost all shuttered and just letting in the thinnest traces of moonlight from outside. The shapes of tables and chairs scattered across the room were also faint...Though that at least gave them a little more cover. And a little more room to move if things really went south.

"…Wait." He muttered, holding a hand up as M'gann stared at him. And then held his breath as those footsteps moved past the door…And then kept walking. His heart slowed down, before jumping into a fast beat as his phone rumbled in his pants pocket. He quickly thanked himself for having the foresight to put it on silent, and fished it out.

He could instantly pick out the other voice on the line; female, and speaking over a roar of voices.

"Superboy, this is Bee talking; we're tied down over here with getting civilians out. I'm not dealing with any more of those gunmen right now…Chances are they're looking for you."

"We can lay low if we have to." Conner replied, eyes going back to those windows and briefly appreciating that they were shuttered. "Take care of the civilians, first. If this really gets ugly, I don't want them getting in the crossfire."

"Got it. We'll keep you posted either way; Bumblebee out."

"Yeah…Superboy out, too." His only answer was the line going quiet, and he let the phone fall back into his pocket, half in and half out.

"So," the words came out fluttering and breathless, and he turned to find Megan collapsed against the wall. It was a relief to see her staring at him instead of through him…Although Conner found himself wishing that scared and suspicious look in her eyes wasn't there. "You're using 'Superboy' now? I don't want to be rude, since I really appreciate being saved from those guns…But I wish I could get just one name to call you." He almost reached out for her, stretching his fingers towards her shoulder. But instead he settled for kneeling in front of her, letting his hand curl into an almost fist on his knee.

"Not to be rude either, but in this situation you need to get used to more then one name." Her eyes narrowed at that, as she frowned over his words before continuing.

"Actually, about that. What…What did you call me back there?" He had to bite down on the curse trying to rasp through his teeth and offered what he hoped sounded like a confused "Megan?"

"That's not what you said before. There was something different about my name…" Her eyes found his, and for a second she lost any trace of fear, trading it out for a piercing look instead. "What was it?"

"I…It was M'gann. That's what I called you." Stupid as it was, Conner found himself hoping that might spark something in her eyes. Some sort of recognition or understanding. Instead, all he got was a troubled, distant look from how her pupils started to go out of focus.

"M'gann…" She repeated the name, testing it as her eyes narrowed and she let the sound roll off her tongue. Barely a second later her eyes squeezed shut while her teeth showed, and she rubbed at her forehead as some hurt traced across her expression. Her voice was low when she spoke again. "Sounds weird…Like another planet or something."

He let his breath out, that tense look on her face helping him decide to just come clean with everything. "That's probably because you're from Mars."

"Mars?" Megan blinked up at him, staring for a moment as her lips parted…And a nervous laugh quivered out of her throat. Soft as it was, it still felt harsh against his ears and made them burn. "I guess I need to change my first impression of you; looks like you do have a sense of humor with jokes like that." Her laugh started to get a little more conviction at that, which made his words snap out of his mouth.

"It's not a joke! What do you think that attack against those soldiers was?" Her giggle cut out, and her eyes went wide as she watched him. Conner already had the feeling that she was getting dragged back to that memory…And he found himself trying to push her a little further into it. "People don't get thrown out of windows on their own. I KNOW you must have felt something when that happened, too."

She shook her head, but the motion was shallow and halfhearted. He let his hand dart out to clasp on her shoulder, ignoring his conscience saying that she hadn't asked for the contact. He was more busy with remembering to keep his touch light and crushing nothing. "Quit acting like this doesn't involve you, M'gann." He let himself use her real name again…But it didn't encourage her to look him in the eye. Instead she kept her gaze low, and her voice a murmur.

"Stop…I don't want to hear this." His teeth wanted to show themselves over that denial. And a part of his head that had been quiet for so many years started pushing thoughts into his head; what if he hadn't gotten there on time, or if her powers hadn't activated? What if he'd been too slow to give her that chance to subconsciously use her powers? And what if he couldn't help her again? He could imagine her body, battered and bleeding out, and that made his anger surge hot through his veins to drown out his fear. He thought he could hear another low "stop" in her voice, but he found himself plowing over it.

"And I don't want to see you keep running from this! M'gann, stop trying to ignore things and actually THINK. You're not going to be safe until you start listening-"

" _STOP!"_ The word crackled across his thoughts like he'd just been hit, and his balance spun as his hand jolted out from the grip he had on her shoulder. His ears could pick out Megan's back hitting the wall as she fell backwards, her breath coming out panicked and fast as their stares locked.

And if he was wide eyed as he watched her, M'gann could beat that easily with how much white was in her eyes, and how hard her heart was pounding. Even with the space between them, it was a drum in his ears. Her mouth kept trying to move, but no words came out until she swallowed hard and tried again.

"I don't…" She whispered, rubbing at her head. "I don't understand anything anymore." He was surprised that he could pick out tears forming in her eyes, although she was quick to blink them away. "I'm supposed to be Megan. Normal, ordinary Megan. But now I need to hide from gunmen with a super powered boy, and I have these powers that I _don't want-"_ Her voice cracked on the last, raw with terror and…

…And he could have sworn he heard hate at the end of her voice as well. But the next second she'd buried her face in her hands, trying to stifle her sobs. And he couldn't tell anything from that, other then a sick, angry feeling at himself as he listened.

"I…" He slowly climbed to his feet, looking down on her. 'I'm sorry' didn't feel right, anymore then 'I wish that hadn't happened.' "I'm going to check outside; make sure we're still hidden." He said instead, and wanted to punch his own head over how much that sounded and felt like things Superman had said before.

Instead, he turned and moved towards the doorway. But forced himself to speak before he moved completely away from her. "I'll come back soon." And he tried to make that sound like a promise, too.

He never noticed that his pocket felt lighter, as he stepped outside.

-o-o-o-

It took time for her thoughts to settle and her breath to become something other then shaky. Minutes or hours, Megan wasn't fully sure; just that there was a long stretch for her heart to slow down, her thoughts to finally yank themselves back into something other then a scared tangle…And realize that she was the only one in the room. As she looked to the space Conner had been standing at, she remembered hearing him promise to be back soon. She thought he was just going to stand apart long enough for the situation to settle down, but-

' _But why would he want stay with someone like you?'_ The thought hissed through her mind with a jolt that made her shoulders want to curl in on themselves and her eyes sting. She shied away from it, pushed it into the back of her head along with those red tinged half-memories. And to keep it back there, she started looking around the room again, desperate for a distraction.

Her eyes had to strain at first to pick out anything; the moon wasn't that good for illumination, even with so many windows stretching along one side of the room. She could barely distinguish the lines of light between glass, shutter and frame from behind her hiding place...And all at once it was too much to stay shoved into the corner of the room.

She didn't yank herself up, although a part of her wanted to get out of that space as quickly as possible. Instead she eased herself forward, still glancing around…But stopped with one hand on the wall as her other brushed at the floor. A glimmer of plastic on the ground caught her eye, and Megan felt her fingers brush up against something small and compact. When her fingers traced over a keypad, she realized it must have been a phone. The screen showed a low battery, and it must have just been running at the tiniest little pixel of energy.

' _Conner's?'_ The question flashed through her head as she curled her fingers around the device. And since she couldn't think of where else it might have come from, she also settled on that as the answer. Her back touched against the wall as she sat back down, cradling the phone in her hands and bringing it up close to her face.

The sensible part of her knew that she should have left it alone, that this was edging in on Conner's privacy…But those uneasy thoughts threatening to crowd in from the back of her mind kept it to just an irritated hum, and Megan focused on pressing the buttons to bring up the menu.

' _Just something to look at until he gets back.'_ She told herself again, eyes already noting that Conner had photos saved to the phone. Those sounded harmless enough to look at, so she opened the file. And for the first time in what had to be hours, felt her lips quirk up as she looked at the images. The first photo was bright and clear, showing him standing outside with a collection of people that had to be his friends. A redheaded boy, a girl with blonde hair, and others that tried to find purchase in her memory and tug at it…But that all paled compared to Conner, taking up the center of the picture and wearing a paper party hat with such a sour expression that she had to fight down a giggle as she looked at it. She moved to the next photo, feeling a smile start to work its way fully onto her lips as she saw him sitting on a park bench and smiling at the camera, and likely whoever was taking the picture. Such a warm look in his eyes as well; if she wasn't seeing it herself, she never could have believed he had the potential to look that happy. And somehow, seeing that helped steady her pulse and drape a calm feeling over her thoughts as she continued-

Her thoughts and even her heartbeat all snagged on the next picture. Her hands, which had been holding the phone so steady, started to shake as well. The shudder bit into her fingers, making the photo held in the video screen go blurry. But she could still pick out the details. Two people stood together, close enough that their sides and shoulders brushed, while their arms were wrapped together and their fingers intertwined. She could easily pick out Conner's black hair, but it was the other person in the photo that made her breath catch in her throat. The same freckles dusting her cheeks, the same long red hair as hers, even the same smile…That was _her_ in the picture.

It took time for Megan to pick out the green skin, but even that didn't change what she was looking at. It matched the same color that had been teasing her vision in the locker room.

And was lingering at the corners of her vision even then. The phone clattered out of her hands as her fingers bunched into fists to vainly try and stop shaking, and she was so certain that there had been green somewhere in the tips of them. Megan stared at them, straining to see if she could pick out anything in the near dark from the room. Her fingers wrenched between loose and relaxed into fists, switching between the two states so fast her skin burned and tendons squirmed...But it didn't keep that stiffness or fog in her head at bay.

"Calm down," she tried telling herself. She left the phone on the floor, still giving the room a soft, electric glow. "Calm down. You're just imagining things. Everything is…" Going to be fine, she wanted to say, but she couldn't force the words out. Or bring herself to really believe them any longer.

" _Little Martian girl…Playing at being normal, now?"_ A mocking voice sneered somewhere close to her ear. _"The same way you play at being a hero, and hide what you are?"_

"Who's there!?" Megan whirled around as the voice continued and she looked wildly back and forth for the speaker. She could pick out the cruel chuckle at the edge of his words, as he continued.

" _You're good at pretending to be innocent…Psimon can give you that much."_ That was when she realized that the voice wasn't in her ear…But in her head. It didn't matter that she clapped her hands over her ears and dug her nails into her hair when she figured that out; she could still feel those words worming into her thoughts. And that they belonged to that same voice in her nightmares. _"But this lie you've made for yourself has lasted long enough. Psimon says…Go back to being what you are."_

That snapped into her head with the force of a command, yanking Megan's head up and her eyes jolt open as something shot through her muscles. The fibers and tendons all started to seize up, and she thought she could actually hear them beginning to stretch and contract. She could feel her clothing straining at the seams as well, suddenly feeling too tight against her.

Her back buckled and arched, as her spine quivered hard enough she was sure it was trying to break loose of her body. The bones all popped loose from the formation they were supposed to be in, one after the other all up her back and into her neck. The sides of her shirt split open with a tearing noise as the muscles in her torso started to swell, and the fabric sloughed off her back like dead skin. Her head pitched forward, her shoulders starting to hunch and refusing to move into anything different.

Her arms weren't moving right, something stretching between them and her sides in a thin web that pulled at her elbows and left everything from there to her shoulder in a tangle. Her legs wouldn't hold her up either, feeling either too weak or too sharp as her bones pressed up against her skin, pushing through the fabric of her skirt and leaving that tattered on the floor.

Megan wanted to scream, but nothing was getting past her throat. Her esophagus was swelling, bulging against her skin and swallowing any cries for help that she tried to get through, leaving her breath to come out ragged and sobbing as she finally smashed into the floor.

" _Now that's better; far more accurate."_ The voice gave a dry chuckle that made her new skin crawl and shiver. The night air was cold on her body, leaving her exposed to that mocking voice. A part of her felt almost glad when its focus shifted away from her…But only until it spoke again. _"Oh…And I see your friend is just in range as well. Did you lie to him, too?"_

" _Stop it,"_ Her thoughts were feeble, as she tried to hold herself up on those shaking, too thin arms. She could pick out an ugly, knotted set of claws taking the place of where she should have had five fingers, curling against the floor as she trembled.

" _Did you hurt him? His mind is tense."_ It was like there was a tether pulling on her head, forcing her awareness to get stretched out wider no matter how much she cried for it to stop. Just like before when she'd somehow shouted into Conner's thoughts, she could feel something of him. Harsh, a tight snarl of emotion, just like that mocking voice observed. _"More guarded then before…But easy enough to push through that."_

" _NO!"_ She opened her mouth to scream that out loud, but she couldn't even manage to form that word. Her tongue felt strange and flat in her mouth, and there weren't any lips to cover the razors her teeth had turned into. All she could manage was…It wasn't even her voice in whatever her throat had turned into. It was a screeching, animal sound that snapped out and echoed in the room. She almost wished she hadn't managed that from how it made her back flinch, hearing it. And when she heard a startled "M'gann!?" from the doorway.

" _That isn't my name-"_ She sobbed out, the same way this wasn't her body.

" _So many lies you tell yourself…"_ The voice almost tsk'd in her head. _"How many does he know about? Let's dig through and find out, shall we?"_ She could pick out a form beginning to move into the doorway as she heard that, almost picked out blue eyes; they stretched wide, and for a heart stopping moment she thought he'd seen her. But they didn't focus on her. Didn't even look at where she was.

Conner didn't have so much as a second to clutch at his head when he collapsed onto his knees. A shrill noise cut through the air, driving him further to the ground. She wanted to reach for him, almost did until she felt those extra joints in her hand and shrunk away from extending them.

And God help her, she could feel him through that opening in her head, even though she wanted to slam it shut so she couldn't hear those screams from his thoughts. He curled up on the floor, his thoughts bracing and trying to fight off that presence.

" _You must have done something harsh to him, Martian."_ And it continued to speak without any trace of pity. Just a cold, clinical curiosity. _"He fights more strongly then before. But we'll find out how to spill his thoughts out yet."_ And then those cries weren't just in his thoughts, Conner was screaming out loud as well…And she couldn't watch him any longer. She tore her eyes away from his tensed up form, feeling like a hideous coward as she did so-

Until her gaze caught on something. An outline in one of the unshuttered corner windows ringing the lounge. She thought that she could pick out pale skin, almost like hers as she looked at that form, and also picked out that it was clearly human shaped. And that she could easily trace those thoughts and attacks back to it, as power seemed to almost radiate off it.

" _Psimon."_ She finally placed the name to the shape. But he took no notice of her, still intent on Conner.

" _Stop fighting, half-breed. You aren't fully Kryptonian, and humans are child's play to break. Your Martian friend proved that by pretending to be one."_

As she watched, that familiar pressure in her head was humming back to life, somehow even stronger and louder in her head then before. It should have terrified her, Megan distantly knew. But between her claws clutching at the ground and her teeth biting at her mouth, Megan didn't have much room for any more terror. And when she saw Conner, curled against the ground and moaning, she couldn't even feel that. What she had churning up in her instead was rage, burning into her thoughts and pushing out that hold the intruder had on them.

" _Get out of his head."_ She snarled, low and menacing as that power continued to coil and lash in her mind. She could feel Conner's thoughts starting to break, as the presence redoubled its efforts in beating down his defenses. And turned away from her completely. _"I said,"_ Her upper body coiled into a spring to match her head, and in the next heartbeat she pushed herself up to howl at the figure in the window.

" _GET OUT!"_ She let that scream through her thoughts and slam into his with all the force of a truck. One that must have blindsided him, from how his head snapped back. M'gann pushed more, letting that anger snarl through her thoughts. It lashed out of her head in a palpable wave of force, and when it reached Psimon…It didn't move through the windows, so much as shatter the glass for getting in the way of it's path. And when it hit him, it was enough force to send him flying. Over to the guardrail, and then THROUGH it as it strained and snapped from the force. Her last sight was seeing him falling off the edge of the boat, and then that shrieking noise was gone from the air as he vanished.

He was gone at least, M'gann knew-

M'gann. That name had slipped into her thoughts without her even realizing it. And it remained wedged in them, the same way her body stayed caught in the shape Psimon had pushed her into. M'gann felt that anger start to leave her mind, now that the threat was gone…Leaving just fear as the gravity of what happened, and the feel of that new body sank back into her.


	6. All He Sees Is White

The gangplank creaked under Gar's weight, and while his body kept wanting to shift into something more solid and bulky, he told himself that a tiger would do. It also wouldn't make the walkway collapse underneath him like a rhinoceros would. And if he was willing to bet that a cat charging towards those guys in masks freaked them out just as bad as a rhino. He smacked one of them off the ramp with a hefty paw swipe when they got too close to the people running…And the screams got a lot louder when the civilians realized there was a tiger around.

' _Oh, COME ON! I'm on your side!'_ He wanted to yell, but the only thing he could manage was a growl. His mood didn't improve any when he saw another soldier managing to touch down on the ramp…And someone tackled into the attacker's side before he could get close, in the same way a quarterback slammed into someone from the other team.

"…That is so unfair!" Gar snapped as he shifted and watched Mal pitch the mook over the side and into the bay. "Why do you get all the cool moves?"

"Unfair or not, it does the job." Karen replied as her feet touched back down on the ground. She kept her hood pulled snug over her face, glancing back at the fleeing crowd. "I did my best to lead the evacuation in civvies, before rushing back here…Looks like we're holding the situation down so far." Gar wanted to question that, but stopped when she shot him a look that said 'trust me, it could have been a lot worse.'

"Yeah, and that's what worries me." Mal replied as he glanced over the railing before moving towards them. "Look...I'm not an active fighter like you guys, but doesn't it feel weird? It's been really easy getting a handle on this-"

"Right, right." Gar cut in, giving Mal what he hoped looked like a knowing, insightful nod as he rubbed at his chin. "It's sort of like the baddies are just handing us this one?" Karen looked like she wanted to argue that for a second, but then frowned as she shook her head, and went to the purse she'd left at the bottom of the gangplank.

"Either way, better touch base with Conner. Make sure they're not sweeping around to look for him or M'gann..." She trailed off as she scooped her phone out of the front pocket, and began punching in some of the buttons. But as the quiet stretched out, she shook her head. "…Are you kidding me?" Bee scowled at the phone, as if she could scare it into working, and when that failed muttered a collection of words Gar had never considered stringing together like that. "Line's dead, and we're still caught up here trying to evacuate. We can't reach them-"

"But I can!" He leaped over to her, grinning despite the situation. "Just tell me whatever they need to hear, and I'll get it to them right away!" He had to keep his teeth closed around 'See, I KNEW this was a Beast Boy Mission,' although that smug grin across his face probably said plenty. Karen rolled her eyes, while Mal turned away to have a sudden coughing fit.

"...Fine. But listen up, because this is what I need you to do..."

-o-o-o-

It felt like someone tried to drive a rail spike through his skull, and even with his invulnerability had almost succeeded. As Conner rubbed at his head the pain was already starting to fade out, but that didn't make having to muscle through it much easier. His vision blurred as his eyes blinked open, making the room go hazy as his fingers ran over and massaged his temples. Something had been tearing down at him with a touch that was nauseatingly familiar, even after several years. He still knew Psimon's methods…And just how strong his mental grip could be. He was amazed that he'd even managed to hold out against it somehow-

" _Conner?"_ His name drifted out of that dimly lit space and echoed in his head; not in his ears, but as his eyes refocused Superboy could instantly see why. M'gann was hunched over in the far corner of the room, staring down at a pair of gaunt, pale claws. Her red eyes were stretched open in a way that made it clear she couldn't believe those hands were hers. Her mouth parted, but the only sound that came out was a low chittering sound that cut out the second it echoed off the walls. She flinched from her voice, curling in tighter on herself.

 _'This isn't-'_ He didn't know how to finish that thought; that this wasn't any of his business, that this didn't concern him and he was only here to make her remember...Which she was a lot closer to, now that she was seeing herself. That was what the still angry and raw part of his thoughts growled at him.

The rest of his head wouldn't let that thought fully process, and that this WAS his business. That he'd felt something pulling his thoughts free from Psimon, with a familiar brush of fierceness that had wrapped itself up in his thoughts for just a second.

The floorboards creaked under his feet as he took the first step towards M'gann. And that anger in his head didn't feel as loud or blaring as before...Not compared to how much his chest hurt when he watched her.

" _What am I?"_ Her voice was so fragile in his ears, shaking the same way her shoulders were quivering and a shudder ran up her neck. He could see her eyes flicker over at him and a solid feeling of terror trying to eat away at his thoughts; it was already shredding through hers...And he could feel something in him wrench when he realized how scared she was of LOOKING at him. That fear of what she might see in his face. He didn't think that he could hate this situation any more, but realizing they were moving through those same doubts and fears from five years ago made him want to punch something. Instead, he forced himself to take a deep breath.

"You're a hero from Mars." He kept his voice steady and level, hoping that she would pick up on that and focus on it instead of her body. But instead her head curled down, and that combined with the fear pouring off her pushed his feet forward several more steps. M'gann caught that motion in the corner of her eye, and flinched as he moved closer. She wouldn't lift her face to look at him, dropping her head lower as her body tensed into a tighter ball. But it at least put her face in easy reach of his hands. He put them both on either side of her head, and his touch must have done something to help her relax; her eyes stopped squeezing shut as they blinked back open to look at him.

" _I…"_ Her throat was still trying to work; he could see her mouth moving, doing whatever she could to form words, but without a human mouth the best she could manage were a few distorted chirps. _"I'm like THIS?"_ And underneath that, he could hear a secondary thought coiling up in her head and trying to squeeze down on her chest; _'This is what I am?'_

"Don't." Conner didn't realize how close much he'd leaned in until he felt his bangs brushing against that plate that formed her forehead. That still didn't make him break eye contact, and if anything he looked at her more intently while trying to press those words into place. "Don't think of yourself like that; you just saved me and stood up to that Psimon guy, remember?" Her thoughts gave a slight waver, but they finally laced into and around his words, accepting them for at least the moment.

"And if you want to…You can change back. Trust me, I've seen you do it a million times." He frantically tried to remember what she'd told Gar as he spoke; what he'd overheard during her lessons with him when it came to shape shifting. "Just…Focus on what you want to be." Slowly, it was starting to flow back into his memory, and he clung to those words; if she couldn't remember, then he had to have perfect clarity for both of them. "Think about the feel of your limbs, how they move under your control." A shudder ran through her body as she listened to him, traveling up through her back and neck until her skin fluttered underneath his fingers. Before it subsided, she'd already ducked her head as a low keen slid through her throat.

" _I…I can't…'_ " Her voice was still so impossibly small, muffled under waves of anxiety and confusion that were crashing against her head. And threatening to spill into his, which shot tension straight into his hands. _"I can't focus-"_ And it was true; he could feel how the strangeness of her body and her fear of it kept wearing away at her thoughts. Conner let his breath out slowly between his teeth, gathering his thoughts back up again as he tugged at the planes of her face so he could look her in the eyes.

" _Then focus on MY thoughts. I remember what you're like."_ He could feel her waver for a second, before he pushed his memories of her forward. There was a bare heartbeat of hesitation from M'gann…And then she latched onto them, like they were all that kept her from drowning.

Then again, considering how he could feel her still struggling to hold onto that tiny scrap of calm, that analogy didn't feel too far off the mark. He pushed and sharpened all of his focus on M'gann…On HIS M'gann. Beautiful, tall enough that they easily fit together. That long hair that he could rest his chin against, and how their hands felt, clasped together. The softness of her lips, even the freckles on her face…His heart was picking up, at the same time he could feel something sinking sharp needles into it and holding it so tight he thought his heart would collapse in on itself.

"Conner." That time, he could hear his name clearly in his ears. Not his head. And felt something resting against him, still shivering a little as it made a few more shifts. When he opened his eyes, he found himself looking at the top of M'gann's head, her face tucked under his chin and nestled against his collarbone. He could just pick out how wide her eyes were, and in his head it felt like she needed to pry herself loose from those memories he was still playing through.

Superboy let them go mute as he watched her. Her eyes slowly fell to her hands, looking at them and slowly flexing her fingers to get a feel for them again. Widening for a second when she saw the green skin coating them, a perfect match for his memory. She was still shaking, from her neck to her shoulders-

They must have realized at the same time that her shoulders were bare, and there wasn't much aside from her hair covering them. M'gann gasped while Conner yanked his eyes back up and turned his head away from her, stammering out an apology.

"I didn't think you'd shift back like that; I thought you had those clothes-" It was only then that his eyes picked out the torn remains of her outfit, strewn across the floor in shreds.

The second that clicked, Conner let his jacket slide off his shoulders and into his hands as he moved towards her. M'gann didn't turn, even though his footsteps were loud against the floor. She only reacted as his jacket fell across her back, jolting her head up and giving a murmured, almost half-aware "thank you."

Even with a coat between his fingers and her skin, he could pick out the feel of M'gann's shoulder and collarbone; it had never felt so fragile before, like a dried out leaf that was fluttering in the breeze. Her breath was fluttering as well, and he could see her shoulders getting pushed back as she fought to get more air into her lungs and even out her heart rate.

"You keep saving me," her voice was hushed as she ran her fingers over the collar of his jacket. "I'm amazed that you keep going through all that trouble…"

"Well…Technically, you did just save me from Psimon, and you helped with that fight from before. So I think we're more or less even?" He offered, but that didn't do much for the tension curling up in her…Though it did convince her to lift her head enough to look at him.

"I-I guess."

"…And it's not trouble." His voice was low as she turned around to fully face him. Her hands pulled his coat close around her, but even with that layer on, he could see how the night air was biting at her skin and sinking into her limbs. His arms twitched, wanting to wrap her up and hold her close against his chest-

He blinked when he felt a weight against his shoulder, and saw that she was resting her head against him. Her weight shifted forward as the adrenaline seeped out of her muscles, and her balance wobbled. THAT was when his arms decided all on their own to wrap around her shoulders, and take that weight off of her feet. She gave a low sigh from his touch, not once moving from her spot against his chest. He couldn't help but rest his head against her hair for a second, letting them move back into place.

It took time for realization to slip in past that warm fog in his head, and the intoxication of his lips brushing against her forehead. But once it did, he pulled back so quickly it was almost a flinch.

"S-sorry," his voice came out weirdly hushed, almost shy in his ears. M'gann was blinking at him, half her focus clearly set on what it had felt like to be curled up against him. "I shouldn't have-" he almost got back up to speaking volume, until she made up her own mind and bumped her head back against his. Her voice was a low thrum against his cheek, wordless but still carrying plenty of meaning. She hummed against him, and as he tentatively traced circles over her shoulders, Conner could feel her relaxing one breath at a time.

"…Wow. Um, do you two need some time alone?" She also tensed up a second time when that voice broke in and forced both their heads up. When his eyes focused on the broken window, Conner could just pick out a blob of green sitting on the edge, and a beak that had somehow worked itself into having a smug smile.

"You've got thirty seconds to explain why I shouldn't be using your tail for a feather duster. I'd start talking." Conner growled out.

"Geez!" Garfield squawked at him. "Fine, fine; Bumblebee saw that the battery on your phone must have died, so she sent me back to look for you. And she wanted me to pass a message on when I found you; so is that good enough for you?"

"…Go on." Conner finally growled out, while M'gann kept staring at the green talking bird.

"She said that they've evacuated all the civilians, but she's worried that there might be something else coming, like those attack goons were just the first wave. And she wants to meet and relay with you." He canted his head to the side when he was done, waiting for Conner's response.

"…Okay, look. Tell her that…Tell Bumblebee that I need her to come up here. We're okay so far, but I'm not sure about moving her just yet. She's…We've both had a rough time. And see if you can find something that she can wear." That feathered head quirked to the side again, giving them a careful look.

"Okaaaay," Gar said, with a 'Karen isn't going to like this' underneath his voice. Conner responded by rolling his shoulders in a shrug; he wasn't going to go dragging M'gann through the halls again while she was like that. "Uh, anything else I should tell her?"

"That it would be good if you hurried. Psimon is here too, and I don't want to be around when he gets back." His voice was sharp on the end, which spurred Gar to take off into the air with a whirr of feathers. It was only after that flutter of wings dropped out to the edges of his hearing that Conner picked up another sound. Fast, stuttering breaths…And when he looked back at M'gann, he could see how much her sides were quivering. When she looked up at him, he could just make out tears collecting at the edges of her eyes.

"M-" he caught himself on her name just in time. "Megan?"

"I'm sorry. But I…You ever feel like you can just remember something you lost?"

' _All the time.'_ He thought, but settled for nodding instead.

"I just…Thought that, when you were…H-holding me. Like this happened before. That you're…Someone so important to me, but I can't remember WHY-" she cut off, and Conner realized how his arms were squeezing against her. Keeping her pressed tight against his chest until he could feel her breathing, and he forced them to relax and give them some distance.

…Though even when he let go, she didn't move very far from him. Her voice was close to a whisper as she continued. "But I know what I'm not, now. I'm not…Megan. I'm not some ordinary girl…And I can't pretend that I am any longer." Her voice settled into something more decisive as she spoke, as she started to blink away those tears in her eyes.

"I'm M'gann…Whoever that is." And beneath that firmness she was trying to force into her voice, he could also pick out an undercurrent of fear; over who "M'gann" might actually be. His throat wouldn't let him speak, so instead he cradled her against his chest, and hoped that his grip was steady enough for both of them.

-o-o-o-

"Glad to see you brought Thunderbird One with you." It was amazing how Superboy could fit wry and tired into the same sentence. Mal just rolled his eyes and muttered "Don't you start, either." while Karen helped M'gann into a change of clothes.

Gar's main focus was on bounding over to where M'gann sat, once she was dressed.

"You know, **I** found that!" Gar let some pride slip into his voice as he looked at her new shirt. "That red X on the fabric has the same feel as my costume, so it was easy enough for me to pick it out!" It didn't hurt that he'd gotten sick of standing around and went tearing through the dresser until his fingers snagged on something that felt familiar...But he decided not to bring that up just yet. "I did good, huh?"

"Y-yeah. Yeah, you did." M'gann tugged at the edges of her shirt, looking unsure on how to make it fit properly.

"S-" He almost called her sis, and had to swallow the word before it got out of his throat. Somehow, she didn't look ready for that, on top of everything else. "M-M'gann? I can call you M'gann, right?" When she nodded, he continued with a little more confidence. "You know you can shift that around, since it's made out of the same material as my suit?"

He tapped his chest, while M'gann managed to dip her head in a nod. "Yes, I...I'm starting to figure that out?" Her eyes flickered over to Conner, and her voice dropped to a murmur. "Conner told me about changing shapes before, and...Helped..." He had to bite his tongue to keep from asking how, and if that had to do with their cuddling session from before. M'gann was closing her eyes by then, resting her hand over her chest where the red lines crossed to form an X. "Just concentrate..." That sounded more like it was for herself then anything else, but as she breathed out her shirt slowly started to stretch and darken, tracing down under her skirt until she was cloaked from neck to toe in a familiar, dark suit. When M'gann opened her eyes, her gaze was instantly caught on it, while her hand tightened into a fist.

"This feels familiar, somehow."

"How familiar?" Her eyes narrowed as she shook her head back and forth, like she was trying to shift something into place in her thoughts.

"It's...Hard to put into words. I keep feeling like there's something right at the edge of my thoughts that I can almost remember...But it's always out of my reach. It's like I'm just getting flashes of something before a bag gets pulled back over my head."

"Hey, do you remember anything about me?" He winced as the question worked out of his mouth, already feeling a sharp pain in the back of his head that told him he shouldn't have asked that; not if he could already guess the answer, and how much he wouldn't like it. She'd say no, and he'd be left alone again-

M'gann was already shaking her head, too. But she froze for a moment, staring straight through him as her mouth started to work. "I...I really wish I could-" Her hand balled into a tighter fist, and she looked ready to drive it into the ground. "I just keep thinking it's something important."

"Okay. Well...That's better then nothing at all?" He offered, as much for himself as for her, while M'gann's eyes kept looking into thin air and trying to pull answers from it.

"And I don't know why, but I'm sorry for...For something?"

"Maybe it's because...You left." He HATED how nasty those words tasted on his tongue, but choked them out anyway. Even when it made M'gann start and stare back at him for a heartbeat. "I get that things were rough, but...Why did you have to leave?"

"Oh Gar…" She whispered, and he could see how wide her eyes went as his name slipped out. She touched her lips as she tested the name again. "Gar, I'm…I'm sorry. I wish I could tell you why, but I don't remember…I wish you hadn't felt any of that though."

"I wish you hadn't left." He repeated, as M'gann wrapped him up in a tight hug. And even though she wasn't sounding exactly like his sister, it was familiar enough that he was ready to drop his forehead onto her shoulder.

"...Wow. And I thought this night couldn't throw anymore surprises at me." M'gann's head jerked up at the new voice before he could do more then register that there was someone standing in the doorway. When he finally managed to focus his eyes, Gar picked out black hair, and a face he knew he'd just seen a few minutes ago.

"W-wendy!?" M'gann's voice was a squeak, as her hands went tight around his shoulders.

"Oh man...Girl, what are you doing here?" Karen was on her feet and moving towards Wendy, shoulders tense; as though she couldn't decide whether to push the other girl outside, or pull her in and out of sight. Wendy solved that by stepping inside herself, glancing around.

"It wasn't too hard to find everyone; I just had to watch where that green parrot-"

"Oh for...I'm a BUDGIE in that form! Why doesn't anyone ever get that!?" Wendy continued over Gar's outburst.

"...Watch where he went, which was straight up. And I figured the only safe place to go was the lounge...So here I am. I was already wondering when HE burst through the window...Didn't expect to find my roommate in green skin, though." His sister bunched up over that, tense enough that it felt like she was trying to hide behind him. Gar could just hear her murmur "...Green isn't as bad as before..." Which Wendy must have caught. She shrugged past Superboy and Karen, didn't do more then give Mal a blink and a small wave before she knelt down next to M'gann. One of his sister's hands was eased off Gar's shoulder when Wendy took it into hers, and M'gann gave a small "But...Why are you here?"

"Because...Look, I'm seeing a bunch of weird stuff tonight, but that doesn't compare to seeing my best friends get shot at. People in tights and with green skin or not, I don't want to leave any of you twisting in the wind."

"Fine," Superboy growled that in a way that made Gar think he meant the exact opposite. "But how are you supposed to help?"

"Well, _Conner Kent,"_ and her voice had a definite smugness to it, with how he double took at his civilian name. "I'm alert enough to pick out who you are. AND that there's something wrong outside."

"Woah, woah...Hold up a minute." Mal stepped between the Superboy and Wendy, looking Wendy right in the eye. "What do you mean, wrong? What'd you see?"

"...To be honest, I didn't want to stay too long in one place to look for sure, but I know I saw of something moving up the other side of the boat. And NO ONE that's part of the school is going to stick around after the gunfire and the fire alarm. I think..."

"...Hon, we're not out of the woods yet." Karen looked back from her spot at the window, pulling the goggles up from her head so she wasn't blinking through the filters.

"...Dammit." Superboy gave a growl of his own, scowling out into the dark. His eyes darted back and forth, while his lip curled up to show his teeth. "She's right. Two squads closing in. They've got us closed off on two points." Gar could already feel his fur starting to stand up on end, as several points started to sink in; the first that getting outside without getting shot at, and probably filled with lead, was going to be next to impossible with Wendy and M'gann. The second was that any help from the League or the authorities would be a good hour away.

From how Mal was tensing up, he must have realized that too. He stood at the window, his knuckles going white as they rested on the sill. "...We're going to need a better plan if we're going to survive this."

Wendy paced towards Karen, and Gar could just catch a flicker of her fingers brushing over the other girl's wrist. He thought for a second that he could see Wendy looking for...Something. Maybe assurance. "I...Don't suppose we're going to get anymore flying tables? Those helped a lot last time."

Superboy and Mal were both looking at M'gann as Wendy spoke; Mal with a worried look, Superboy fighting to keep from blanching. And M'gann...

...His sister was still a knot of tension and shivers. But she wasn't curled in on herself quite as much when she looked up. "I-I might be able to help? I still don't remember a lot, but..." She pulled herself to her feet, looking between Gar and everyone else as he tried to give her hand a reassuring squeeze. "...I don't want to wait around for another attack. Or for Psimon-"

"...Hell. Psimon is here, isn't he?" Superboy didn't QUITE flinch when Mal cut her off, settling for a curt nod instead.

"Yeah. We had to deal with him before...And I think that if he's going to try something else, we're going to need to be at top strength." And they weren't going to manage that with M'gann having holes in her memory. She must have known that too, from the way her grip tightened around Gar's hand, and how she looked Superboy straight in the eye.

"Conner? Like I said before...I'll do what I can. And if..." She trailed off, glancing up. Gar only got the beginning of a "Wh-" onto his tongue when she went from staring to clutching at her head. Her mouth was open in a scream, but all that came out was a high pitched breath.

But on the edge of that, he could just pick out something else. A noise like a skreel of static that was cutting in on the edges of his hearing. And it wasn't just him, as Superboy yanked his head up. His eyes were wide, all white with just pinpricks of blue in them, while his teeth were showing in a snarl.

"S-" M'gann's mouth was still trying to move, right as that shrill noise sunk right into Gar's head like a set of teeth. Her words jolted out as the others started to flinch. "Psimon!" He could barely hear the name over how much his head was pounding. His vision was going dark as M'gann pulled herself upright, standing as straight as possible on her knees as she stared out towards the windows. The vise kept squeezing at his thoughts, and he could FEEL something smug behind that attack. Like the creepy psychic guy was right behind all of them, holding them immobile by the scruffs of their necks. Superboy was still thrashing, and his shoulder crashed against M'gann. And somehow, that seemed to make things shift into place as her mouth snapped shut from his touch.

 _"NO."_ The word crackled across his head, cutting through the noise. _"Not going to happen again-"_ M'gann's voice blared loud, and he swore there was a flash green that splashed across his vision as something crashed into what was clamping at his head. The two presences grappled for a second as M'gann's head jerked back-

And then everything went silent, as she slumped to the ground. The paralysis snapped out of his limbs as M'gann's eyes rolled shut and she crashed into the floor, limp and motionless. A second later, and Superboy thudded against the ground as well. M'gann was out cold, and Superboy was stretched out on the floor next to her, equally motionless. "Oh, no..." Gar had time to mutter, just as he heard the first faint footfalls as the soldiers stepped onto the ship deck.


	7. Her Head Is A Battlefield

"Ughhh." It wasn't the most eloquent thing he'd ever said, but that managed to perfectly convey the nausea and headache that was settling into Conner's senses. His throat was dry as he croaked out "...Getting real tired of feeling like there's spikes gouged into my head," and slowly cracked his eyelids open. Then they flew open when he realized that it wasn't a roof over his head. His eyes refused to accept what he was looking at until he blinked them again, and Conner found himself staring up at something that looked like a cave, tinged with indigo and streaks of violet. As he pushed himself upright for a better look, he could hear M'gann's breath rasping out next to him.

"M'gann?" She groaned in answer, lifting herself onto her elbows as she glanced around...And then sucked her breath in as she caught sight of the same things. Her eyes were reflecting the light, making them look like chips of purple that had been set in her face. He could also see a faint flicker of recognition as she kept watching, and feel the same thing settling into his thoughts; with the shock of his first view easing out, Conner knew that he'd been here before. And that they'd somehow been pulled back.

"We're...In my head?" She whispered, and Conner nodded as he took a better look.

At first, he thought that someone had scattered fragments of broken glass across M'gann's head, left them to litter all the sides of her psyche and slowly sink into the walls that made up this mental space. That guess only lasted until the pieces closest to them flickered, like light rippling off a mirror and somehow changing what he was looking at. For a brief second Conner saw himself and M'gann standing by what he instantly knew were the rock walls of the kitchen…And then the image broke up again, going to static and then reverting to just a dulled out, jagged shard. Above him, Conner could pick out more images trying to flicker into place, before cutting out.

"M'gann…" He breathed out, staring around them in disbelief at those ruined memories. "…Who did this to you? Psimon?"

"I wish I knew," her voice was shaking, and he could see a quiver moving up her back as she looked around. Those clothes from before had also made it into her mind, still not quite fitting to her right, and M'gann tried to tug his jacket around her shoulders a little more tightly as she crossed her arms. Her skin was a gray-blue with the lighting reflecting off the walls of her mindscape, while her eyes had an almost violet color...But it all looked sickly. Either too saturated or too washed out, depending on how the light glowed and skipped off of the shards. And she kept her shoulders bunched up as she kept squeezing at her arms and slipping her fingers into the folds of the jacket fabric, glancing around. Before Conner could register what he was doing, his hand was grasped around her arm and brushing at her fingers, while he tried to make his grip steady and reassuring...Just something to help keep her grounded.

"This explains why my head is such a mess, though. If this is what's happened to my thoughts-" She cut out, her head snapping to one side as a low chuckle echoed off the caverns of her mind.

 _"An interesting counterattack, Martian. Pulling me into your head so I can't fight the others."_ Conner let tension snap through his muscles and push him into high alert, trying to pick out where Psimon's voice was coming from. _"But we're on a level playing field, with how scattered your focus is. Look at how messy you've let your psyche become. You might be able to hide for now...But rest assured, I WILL find you, and break what's left of your head. And since you brought the Kryptonian here as well, I'll be glad to extend the same to him."_ The voice faded out, leaving just echoes that kept M'gann coiled and nervous under his hand.

"C-conner, I swear I didn't mean to bring you here, too-" M'gann was still glancing around when Conner tightened his grip on her fingers, pulling her attention back to him.

"I know; it's dumb luck... But I'm not interested in seeing what happens if he finds us." He could already imagine what that would mean, looking back at the weak light pulsing from her thoughts; not nearly strong enough to hold against Psimon. He could also see her broken to Psimon's whim, and him a slave...At best. If Psimon decided they were worth more as puppets instead of being torn apart entirely. M'gann tugged at his arm as she started to run, and he knew that the same thing was going through her head.

Those echoes of Psimon's thoughts followed them as they ran down the twists and tunnels that had formed in her head, the light from her thoughts just barely illuminating the path. But they never felt like they put any distance, and as he smugly announced _"Closer now,"_ Conner KNEW that his words were louder and more immediate then before. It kept M'gann running as well, eyes narrowed as she tried to pick out something in her mind. He could feel the stress in her grip, as her mind refused to order itself or listen to her.

She was worse off then he first thought, the footing became more jagged and difficult the further they ran, darting through blind corners. M'gann made a sharp turn on one of them, before jolting back and slamming her shoulder into his chest. Looking over her, he could see how the path narrowed and the wall stretched away, leaving them with just a ribbon of pocketed, rough hewn rock to move along. And at the edge of that, a chasm stretching below them that he couldn't even begin to pick the bottom out of, thermal vision or not. The drop and edge of the path traced through the landscape, another jagged wound that had been sunk into her mind.

Conner was stuck on that thought, and focusing on keeping his feet on the path until they finally turned another corner and found themselves facing a wall of broken images. The shards could have sensed the agitation pouring off of both of them, from how the images flickered and pulsed, too fast for the eye to follow. One of those broken shards loomed in front of them, large as a bizarrely arched doorway and looking like a solid sheet of light.

 _"No where else to run?"_ Conner tensed, knowing that Psimon must have just found the path they ducked into, and he frantically wondered if he could face him alone.

 _'Not a chance.'_ He already knew, right as M'gann shuddered against him. They didn't have time to backtrack...And as Psimon's laughter echoed off the chamber, Conner realized they didn't even have time to make a plan. Not when Psimon's voice made the floor shudder, and that strip of ground go even narrower as it started to crumble away.

"Superboy-!" M'gann was scrambling towards him as the rock disintegrated into dust and pebbles under his feet. Her hand was stretched out...Too slow, Conner knew. He could hear something roaring up from the depths as he tumbled over the edge. His breath froze up as he braced for a fall, and whatever was waiting for him at the bottom.

Until gravity suddenly paused around him. Didn't pull as much as it should have, or with the same force as before. Conner hovered in the air for a split second as the air hummed around him, and he heard a familiar drone in his mind. M'gann's hand clapped around his wrist, and her breath squeaked out between her teeth as she yanked back on his arm. The bubble around him shattered with that motion, and he pitched backwards from the edge before crashing into her shoulder. And then onto the floor as gravity fully took over with a strong bite as he pulled M'gann down as well.

For a second, he just breathed and checked to make sure the ground underneath him WAS solid. "...Way too close." M'gann breathed out from beside him. When he glanced over, she was staring down at her hands. "Didn't think I could do that...Even though it feels like I've done this before..." M'gann glanced at him from the very edges of her eyes, looking almost embarrassed at the discovery.

"You have." He replied, then added "Thanks..."

There wasn't time to say more, as that groan from the rock started up again. He could hear it right underneath them, as he scrambled to his feet and M'gann pulled herself up.

"Conner, _look out_!" M'gann cried out as she pushed him back as the ground broke, and dove into the light in the same instant. He thought they were both going to crash into something solid...But instead he found himself falling through air as that light bit into his eyes.

Before they ever cleared, something smashed against his cheek and sent him sprawling onto the floor. Bruises sunk into his face as his eyes watered, and he blinked to clear them. When he looked up, he found himself staring at a green mass showing teeth at him...And his body wouldn't move. Wouldn't pull itself up or fight back, instead paralyzed with fear. His claws gripped at the ground-

 _'Claws?'_ He could feel his hands ending in two fingers instead of five, as the scenery blurred around him again, and he felt himself...Felt M'gann get back on her feet. Through her feet he went padding through the tunnels of Mars, her head and back hunched as low as possible to keep a low profile. All while she kept whispering _'Don't notice me. Don't notice me'_ over and over through her head, half a prayer...And half a suggestion, as he heard that familiar hum. He wanted to scream at her not to do that...But his tongue wasn't working, and he could still feel the marks on their shared face, along with more sunk into the ribs. Where she'd picked them up, he didn't know...And wasn't sure he WANTED to know; they spurred her on as she climbed through narrow spaces, places where those larger then her couldn't follow. When the tunnel opened up, it was in front of a massive hangar, and she scrambled towards one ship while she prayed for no one to see her.

 _"I don't-!"_ If he was unnerved, M'gann was terrified. He could hear it in the voice close to his ear, shaking on every breath. And he could feel, in that strange mental pocket they'd been dropped into, her trying to shrink away from the images. _"I don't want to see this!"_

They were surrounded by red. He could feel her conscious scrabbling at the rocks, trying to find a way out...But with no luck. _"M'gann..."_ He tried again to keep his thoughts steady for both of them. _"Be strong."_

"You're strong-" The words were in his voice as they darted through the air, making the memory feel somehow less pressing then before. Not consuming M'gann's thoughts, and giving him room to breathe as well. M'gann must have felt something from them, as she stopped struggling.

"I like your t-shirt," Her words were nervous as the cavern and spaceship melted into a different set of rock walls and machines. He could feel how much her heart was pounding, even while his own lips quirked up into a cautious smile. He could still feel M'gann right at the edges of his perception...And how much it lifted her spirits when she saw him smile.

He blinked again, and Conner found himself standing back in that dark space of her mind. He tensed, expecting to feel Psimon's grip in his head at any second...But it never came as he glanced around, and realized that the passages around them broke off in different places, and the floor underneath them was solid. Somehow, they'd traveled through her memories, from one part of her mind to another. And as he glanced back at those memories, Conner realized how they were smoother around the edges. Less broken, and looking stronger.

"I...I'd seen that before. I kept trying not to listen to it, or pay any attention to it." M'gann was right next to him, hand still on his wrist. She sounded hesitant, like she wasn't sure those were really HER memories. Until she lifted her head back up, and held Conner's eyes. "But now...I can remember some of it."

"I-" Her voice was hoarse, as she stared at the mended portions of her mind. She barely even blinked as the images solidified, pulsing and changing at a rate that matched Conner's heartbeat. "...I remember." Her skin rippled white before settling back into green. "I remember living on Mars, and escaping to Earth, and-" She trailed off as she looked back at Conner.

"...I remember you." Her feet scuffed against the door as she stepped away from him, shaking her head. "Or some of you. And a little of what happened?" But not all of it. He could tell with how soft her voice still was.

"...We need to fix this. I don't like it, but..." But it was better then letting Psimon have his way with them. He found himself speaking, startling a nod out of M'gann. "Y-yeah. If we're going to have any chance, I need to remember..." There was an unspoken 'however' hanging in the air as she continued. "I'm scared of finding out."

 _'I'm scared of what happens to you when you do find out,'_ he shoved the thought into the back of his head, before she ever had the chance to hear it.

-o-o-o-

"This wasn't what I had planned tonight." Karen sighed as she glanced between the windows. With the exception of one completely shattered window, the glass was unmarred by any cracks or bullet holes, but she didn't want to take any bets on how long that would be the case. So far all of her guesses had been wrong. "This isn't what I had planned at all," she repeated, trying to keep her voice a little lower; no point in giving the guns something to target, just in case they were listening in.

"Dodging bullets isn't always something you do? I wouldn't have guessed that with the costume." Wendy somehow kept her voice level, which Karen had to smile at.

"It's not what I plan my leisure around. I was hoping to fix things up with M'gann in time for some late drinks tonight; take you and her for a night out on the town. I wasn't thinking we'd be dealing with assassins and psychics with a grudge."

"Yeah...You know, in hindsight I should have been able to figure this out a lot quicker." Wendy's eyes were still on M'gann, only taking a moment to flicker to Karen and Mal as she spoke. "That my best friend is an alien and a superhero."

"Actually, 'was' is a better word. She's not up and fighting crime yet." Karen could feel that antsy feeling trying to leak back into her voice. She didn't let it, instead crossing over to where Mal was. "No bullets slamming into the walls yet. Pretty sure that's a good sign."

"Yeah..." Mal frowned out, keeping as low a profile as a former linebacker could manage, just glancing out into the night. "Wish I could tell WHY, though."

"Well...There's no psychic attacks now. And if Meg and Conner are both out cold..." She still couldn't pick out anything other then a few distant silhouettes, but she was sure they weren't moving any closer. "Could be Psimon isn't around to leave orders either."

"Means they don't have a solid chain of command going." Mal sounded almost too pleased at that, though a second later the reasons why clicked into her head and she couldn't fight down a smile either.

"What do you say we give them something else to worry about? Keep their attention away from here-"

"WAY ahead of you!" Gar squeaked up in excitement. "Where do you want to hit them?" Karen was already pulling her goggles back over her eyes, letting the calculations run through her head. Set numbers on one side of her mind, a chunk of percentages moving through the rest of her thoughts as she counted out the numbers. "Gar...You'll want to flank them from the right. Hit 'em hard and don't give them anytime to recover. I'll cover you. Mal..."

"...Don't worry, Bee. No huge risks from me; I'll mop up whatever you and Beast Boy miss. What does that buy us?"

"Five minutes, maybe? Not a lot..." Not optimal, she knew, but she didn't want to gamble that their targets would stay confused long enough to come up with something better. And from the grim looks settling over her team's faces, they'd decided on that as well. Karen paused next to Wendy as Gar slipped through the door, and Mal followed.

"Sorry to put you on the spot like this, but-"

"But I can watch over them. Don't worry about me...Or them; just work on making sure those guns don't get anymore use." Wendy's voice was already hardening up, as Karen gave her a pat on the shoulder. "Right. Just yell if there's any trouble. I hope your stadium voice is still good." Wendy managed a nod and a shaky grin, giving Karen's hand a quick squeeze before she went moving out the door as well.

-o-o-o-

The other woman's eyes were a grey blue, and filled with a light that made M'gann want to lift straight up into the air. A welcoming, gentle look was on her face, and approving as well. She could hear this woman...Marie, her thoughts told her, saying that she was family.

Family on Earth.

Stepping back into her mind, M'gann felt her balance take a dip before she could feel the ground under her feet as a low buzzing filled her ears. She went grasping for Conner, her fingers finding his right as she wondered WHY it was so instinctive to reach for him.

"Sorry-" she started to say, when that buzz in her ears shrieked into static that drowned out her thoughts...Save that what she was feeling didn't belong there. A second later something snapped across her head like a cable recoiling and striking her across her face.

 _"You need a better grasp on your mind, Martian. You stepped right into my path."_ She couldn't see him; her eyes couldn't focus right...But she could feel him digging his presence into her thoughts. _"I might not be able to perfectly manipulate this place...But it won't be hard to break YOU down instead."_

"Conner-" She tried to say, but her words weren't working right...And everything outside of her own eyes and thoughts was moving so _slowly._ Even Superboy didn't seem to realize what was going on, turning just fractions each second.

 _"A cluttered mind is easy to hide in. And distort."_ She only heard a snicker behind her, and a pale blur before five points of force dug in to the back of her skull, wrenching backwards as a handful of her hair was grabbed. Her skin screamed from the pressure, but all M'gann could manage was a gasp as her eyes watered. _"And easier still to stage an ambush. Careless, careless."_ Psimon grinned down at her in a way that made her stomach churn as she struggled. When she pulled against him, her feet barely felt like they could hold her up.

"If you want to struggle, then by all means," Psimon continued. "But you won't get far-" Conner didn't shout so much as roar over Psimon's words, and the sound made everything ripple again as the world lurched back into full speed. M'gann's eyes rolled, and she could just see Psimon turning to throw up a hand and leave Superboy to smack into air with a grunt of pain. When the psychic's hand tightened into a fist, Conner went flying.

"You think you can fight me, half breed? You can't even manage your own thoughts. You're worse off then the girl." Psimon sneered as Conner hit the wall. He was already trying to get to his feet...But Psimon was blur as he blinked between the two spaces. One second M'gann felt his fingers digging into her head, and the next heartbeat leaving her to fall slack to the ground as he stood in front of Conner. His palm slammed into Superboy's chest...And M'gann knew, somehow _knew_ that he shouldn't have been strong enough to stagger Conner-

In the real world, M'gann realized with a jolt. The rules really were different in their own heads. "The Martian is easy enough to brow beat; what chance do you have compared to her...?" Conner strained against the hand pushing into his chest as Psimon narrowed his eyes. "Oh, now that is ironic...She isn't the only one walking around with some neurosis slowing her down. Let's see how you express it."

Conner's head snapped forward, and M'gann could pick out an high, strained sizzling noise in the air. His mouth hung open, and she could hear his lungs trying to work and send something through his throat; a yell, a scream...But nothing more audible then his breath straining out. That burning, crackling noise blanketed everything, along with something that had a smoky taste and smell choking up the air. Conner was shaking, barely keeping his feet-

But Psimon's focus was off her, M'gann realized. She didn't have much of a plan as she pulled herself upright, other then do something to stop Psimon. To get Conner away from him...Her hand was up before she realized what she was doing, and when she pulled it back, Conner slumped to the ground as Psimon lost his footing. He regained it quick enough though, snapping free from her grip and turning to face her with a glare. Her eyes were still blurry, when something clamped around her from both sides and tossed her forward. Right into Conner as he tried to climb to his feet.

Conner's jacket didn't do much to cushion her or soften the blow. When she smashed against him, all the breath rattled out of her lungs and left her slumped inside the baggy clothing.

_"You can still stand? Incredible; I never guessed you would be so stubborn."_

Another attack slammed into them, sending them both flying backwards and crashing with enough force that she could FEEL the wall behind them splintering. Conner screamed when he hit the floor, and a keening noise seeped out between her teeth as SOMETHING, something that had to be Psimon's will, twisted away at her leg like it meant to shatter it. By the time gravity took over, she was limp from the hurt, and Conner was only kneeling as they crumbled to the ground.

 _"And still you don't break...Yet."_ At that, she could feel the landscape around her start to twist and shift...And the wall behind them groaned as her skin continued to throb from those blows. Her head swam from the pain, but through that she could still feel the weight of the wall shifting, and then starting to pitch towards them. He was going to bury them, if he could. Conner stared up at the wall, before throwing himself over her. Through the mental link she could feel agony biting into his chest, settling in muscle deep as he tried to shield her from the wall coming down. M'gann stared up at it, and the crushing weight as her thoughts all swam-

And there, just a little away from them, another shard of thought embedded in the wall. It flickered, pulsed, and looked more welcoming then getting trapped under the ruins of her head. M'gann pushed against Conner, her foot screaming as he froze from her shoving against him. He stared at her as she cried out "There!" and he twisted his head just in time to pick out what she was shoving them towards. His arms tightened around her as his feet pushed off against the floor, as they half jumped and half fell under the path of that memory. The light flashed around them as they plummeted through it, and M'gann could distantly hear the wall come crashing down around them.

The noise faded out as she plunged into the memory. Silence closed in around M'gann, blanketing her and leaving her strangely calm. Then faintly, she could pick out something on the edge of her hearing; someone breathing right next to her.

Conner's lips were warm on her neck, pushing out any tension in her shoulders. When they moved to cover her mouth, all her control seeped out underneath the kiss. M'gann let the green wash back over her skin as she hummed into his mouth, sighing when they finally broke apart and came up for air.

Whatever she was running from felt distant, the same as those hurts that had been pushed into her skin. They didn't matter compared to how close she was with Conner, fitted into the fold of his body and being able to just feel his own thoughts; how peaceful it was to have this moment.

_M'gann-_

His voice flared up in her head, somehow outside of the memory she was reliving, desperate and...And pained, and when she felt the strain in his words the memory snapped into something different. A voice crackling over an audio channel as she stood staring at a screen suspended in the air. The words were all muffled in her head, and she could feel the world start to fall out from underneath her feet as she stared at Marie's picture. As if she could will her new mother to somehow come back if she kept watching, didn't listen to the words saying-

Dead. Dead and gone, and nothing she could do about it. The world spiraled around her as those words sank into her head and heart, and her strength seeped out of her limbs.

M'gann tumbled out of the thought fragment, already pushing her foot out to catch herself. Her balanced shorted out before her thoughts could catch up and remind her of what had just happened. A flare of pain raced up her leg as her foot hit the ground, and her body followed it as her knees buckled and she went crashing into the ground. Above her, she could see Conner slouching against the wall and clutching at his chest as he slid down to his knees. Psimon wasn't right behind them or trying to bring anything down around them, at least. Which gave her time to glance down and figure out what had gone wrong.

Her suit had been torn along the knee, hanging down in black ribbons that made her feel strangely sick with how they flapped around, almost like strips of skin instead of fabric. Her breath caught when she took a closer look, and saw something white jutting out from beneath the cloth, while her muscles all screamed. It was blinding pain, bad enough that she knew her leg had to broken and that was bone sticking out...Until the surface of all that white rippled as her skin twitched, and she lost some of that conviction.

 _'White skin.'_ She realized around the dryness leeching into her throat. That explained why her balance was almost non-existent, as her new foot claws twitched and curled uselessly against the ground. Memory of having that shape on Mars or not, it still pumped fear and nausea through her head, looking at it. She could feel the change stop somewhere around her knee, but that did little for the panic screeching back into her head. It didn't matter what she could remember, walking around Mars on legs like that; it still filled her with something that she loathed...And shied away from.

 _"So scared."_ Psimon's voice cut into her head, laughing and thick with contempt. It bounced off the walls...Which somehow seemed darker then before. The shards above them pulsed in time to the pain in her leg and the throbbing in Conner's chest; bright and then dulled out...And strangely fragile looking when she focused on the pain. _"Are you still keeping secrets from yourself? How long will you last like that, being just half the monster?"_ Her warped leg twitched at that, as M'gann tried to turn away from the voice...And the look Conner was giving her. She could see how wide and bewildered his eyes were, and it just drove that sick knot deeper into her chest as she tried to curl up in his coat. _"No matter. We'll see what you are soon enough- Ah, this looks like a closer memory."_ The hurts in her body screamed as Psimon twisted his attention over to her thoughts and started to dig into them. She could picture him sinking a hand into one of the shards, while before her eyes her mentalscape started to ripple. Her head felt strained as her thoughts dug in and tried not to be dragged back to...To wherever Psimon was pulling them. But she could still catch glimpses as her eyes narrowed; a familiar carved wall, a poster hanging on it...A fragment of catching those blue eyes before Conner suddenly loomed real in front of her face as he clapped his hands over her shoulders.

"M'gann, less listening to him. We need to focus!" He tried pulling her up, before the motion cut out and he gritted his teeth. It made her focus snap to him instead of Psimon though, putting a wall between herself and the other psychic.

"Superboy, are you-?"

"I'm fine-" he started to say, before he crumpled to his knees with a bitten-off grunt. "That doesn't sound like fine." M'gann forced more volume into her voice as she watched him, and tried to find her own balance. Her foot didn't listen to her as M'gann tried to coax it back into a more human shape, and her hip burned as she stood...But it meant Conner wasn't straining to help her.

"Okay," she whispered around a dry throat. "Okay, I know that I need to focus...And I'm starting to get a good idea of how dangerous this is." She was cautious with the weight on her leg. Cautious on paying it much mind as well, as she hoped her mindscape would stay stable as long as she ignored it.

-o-o-o-

When she felt the open air chill on her skin, Karen let herself flow into a smaller shape. How the Martians and half-blooded Martians pulled this off, she didn't know. But for her, it was like holding her breath as the world went bigger and her muscles all squeezed down.

A heartbeat later, everything was stable and several sizes larger, as her feet touched nothing but air and a low thrum settled behind her back. She had one moment as she pushed herself skyward to settle into things.

And then there was the sound of something heavy pounding across the floor while a guttural roar tore through the air. She shot into the air as her ears picked out something massive crashing into the first soldier, then charged when it hit the floor and rushing into the next attacker. Gar was just a low, four legged thermal blur in her goggles, moving faster then the other blobs of color. She darted after him, letting power crackle and bite at the edge of her fingertips...Just waiting to get shot into anyone that decided to get back up again. When she zapped one, he wasn't in any hurry to try again, while ahead Gar continued to carve a path as a giant gorilla...Still just a few steps ahead of the gunfire as the soldiers started to realize what they were dealing with.

The floorboards underneath splintered and crackled from the bullets flying wide and punching through, and Karen winced when she realized M'gann's old room wouldn't be the only thing that needed to be remodeled and touched up. If you could even fix the tears made by bullet holes.

 _'No time to think about that now, girl. Focus!'_ She pushed herself through the air, and forced the chocking taste of gunpowder out of her nose and mouth; she couldn't even taste the river any longer. With a low _thunk thunk thunk_ the bullets kept going as they dug into floorboards, siding, and pinging off metal railings...Everything that wasn't skin and bone, thank the powers that be. Overhead she could hear some of the stray bullets slamming into the hulls of the lifeboats. The ropes that held them creaked as the weight shifted as well.

Gar's outline had dropped down lower to the floor, turning into a different shape that was a little harder to hit. She could just pick out long fur and a tail as he crashed into another attacker with a roar that she swore shook the deck. One of the lifeboats gave up when that sound slammed into it, the ropes breaking apart and sending it falling and smashing against the side of the ship. By then Gar was a blur in her eye again, as she darted and wove back through the chaos; another sting at the back of one soldier's neck to drop him, darting just past the vision of another to make him falter...

...And with Mal trailing just behind and throwing whoever was left over across the side, Karen was starting to think their chances were looking better then she'd first thought. He was managing even with the floorboards slick from the late night fog, and torn up from the fight. And with the guardrails that dented from Beast Boy and the gunfire, it was the easiest thing in the world for him to keep throwing them overboard. A wolf was cutting and snapping through the group now, chasing down the last of the stragglers, and Karen let herself breathe.

Until she heard more footsteps off to their side. Raised voices, and then Karen realized that the second wave had just moved in. She tried to raise her own voice to yell for Mal to look out, picking out those guns getting trained on them. Mal was just noticing them as well, as he just pulled his head up to look at them, trying to step back...And then his back hitting the rails while the floor tapered into something narrow as he hit the edge of the boat. She could see his balance wavering for a second, his feet sliding uselessly against the floor...And then he started to tip over.

When the gunfire started, Mal was already falling over the edge.


	8. Mind Games

Even though it felt like he was getting glass pushed into his chest with each step, Conner found himself appreciating the burns in his skin; the pain kept him grounded, kept his body from being convinced that there was also something wrong with his leg, as M'gann's pain and that sense of being off balance kept flaring into his thoughts with each step she took.

It also kept him from losing himself in those memories. He could still feel her skin under his lips, and the contented thrum from her thoughts as they moved through that memory. Those sensations tried to stick at the front of his thoughts, pull him back to a better time.

...One where he didn't have to worry about his once girlfriend not remembering anything, or getting chased through her head by a demented psychic and wondering how much more of this he could take. Conner let his next step drive his foot into the ground, sending a jolt through his side and lance up through his chest. That made his breath hiss out between his teeth as he put all his attention on how there were a dozen sharp points working at his skin. He still hadn't gotten the focus, or the time to figure out just what Psimon had done to him, save that it felt like there was still a slow burn working its way out through his skin. And on how the walls around him looked like a strange match to the state of his flesh. It was hard to tell through the dark colors that stuck to the surfaces, but he was sure he could pick out cracks spider webbing through M'gann's mental world. Chinks and breaks in her psychic walls...And he could still remember what happened to that wall that almost crushed them. He'd felt his thoughts straining and screaming to stay straight, to stay focused on protecting M'gann and then leaping for that doorway instead of going slack.

When he took another step and felt more aches as he breathed out, Superboy thought he could see M'gann wince in the corner of his eye, and gave her a puzzled look.

"I can feel it too," she replied, glancing down at his ribs. "Not as strongly, but I know how much you're hurting...And what it's doing to your thoughts."

"What do you mean?" She ducked her head, her shoulders bunching up as she spoke. Still shy, still uncertain...But sounding more and more like the M'gann he knew with each word. Conner still wasn't sure just how he felt about that, even while he listened.

"I mean...I've been thinking about what happened with Psimon's attack. And how things don't look right, especially after what..." Her breath caught in her throat, before she swallowed and forced herself to continue, not even glancing at her foot. "What happened to us. I don't think we want him to catch us again; not if he managed to break part of this," she glanced up at the ceiling. "...I don't want to find out what happens if we get torn up again...And can't defend ourselves any more." And he could tell from how tight her voice was that she wasn't just talking about their mental selves. He could remember being screaming and savage in the deserts of Bialya...And somehow, that felt like the best he could hope for if Psimon got real access to their thoughts once the fight went out of them.

"...Our identities are on the line." He heard the words growl out between his lips. Along with their free will...Even thoughts. He forced himself to continue with, "More reason to fix this so we CAN fight back. Come on," and he tugged towards the next doorway. Unsure about her remembering or not, he still knew, "We're not going to have a chance if you're not able to use your powers. I don't think I'm stubborn enough to take him on alone-"

He could just see M'gann staring at him, straining to remember something as they stepped through.

They were still in that strange place between their minds; he could feel the air on his skin, but also how her hair was whipping around in the wind. How everything around them was blinding white...And with a jolt he knew they were back in her mind, just at a different time.

The sky turned black, tongues of orange licking at the underbelly of thick smoke clouds. He could feel the heat from an explosion on skin...But he couldn't sense himself. He wasn't there, and he could feel that thought lodged deep in M'gann's head. That he was GONE; wiped away from her mind, and that spark that was always there extinguished. Along with the rest of her friends. All gone.

A pain drove through his chest as the scenery blurred back into rock walls, and what happened came crashing down around him; the training exercise, the belief that they were losing their teammates one by one...He could feel tears burning their way down M'gann's cheeks, while her grief and guilt both chewed away at his insides. And at the corner of that...The realization that she couldn't let it happen again. That she could NEVER let it come to this and threaten her teammates, no matter what.

Lurking in the back of his mind and beyond that tangle of memories, he could feel Marie's eyes staring out from the photo.

Conner felt something drop out of his stomach as he watched M'gann. It was hard, seeing that memory of M'gann sobbing, to remember why he wasn't with her any more; why he needed to turn his back on her...For the good of them both, he told himself as phantom pains started to settle back into his chest.

There was a flicker of a memory in his own head; seeing the moon stretched out in the sky, and a caped figure coming down, outlined clear against it. Then how he'd ultimately turned away from Superboy-

Conner slammed the memory shut and pushed it to the back of his mind, before M'gann ever had the chance to glimpse it.

 _'We're focused on HER head. Not mine.'_ Conner told himself, as the stitches sunk back across his heart and lungs. Whatever Psimon had pushed into his chest was still smoldering away, straining at the chance to start burning him again. Conner fought to keep his breath even, remembering how it had felt like he was going to drown on fire in his lungs when Psimon attacked him. He wasn't going to experience that again, if he had any choice.

M'gann's sob cut into him again, as he watched her cry into Captain Marvel's shoulder. And kept having to fight down that memory of Superman, and the hurt still burning away and trying to push him back into anger.

It was a relief when M'gann's head finally let go of them, even if he had to blink to get his eyes to work again.

"Conner? Look down." M'gann's voice was strained in his ears...But when he looked towards his feet he could see why. They weren't standing on the ground anymore; instead it was like there was glass under their feet, and beneath them, he could pick out a familiar tangle of mental landscape. The kitchen from the cave bled into the interior of her Bio-Ship, while roads cut weird paths through cornfields and harbor side towns. The violet from her mind bled down into orange and red, making him feel like they were standing on top of a sky at sundown.

"I...I remember." M'gann was staring down at it all, eyes darting from one thing to another before she added on "Almost..." in a hushed whisper. "There's...There's just something missing. Like there's just a few pieces left."

Conner wanted to tell her something encouraging; at least nod his head...Until that coal next to his heart decided that his skin was too still for its liking. Conner put his teeth together, eyes squinted as M'gann stared at him, resting her own hand over her heart and looking like she wanted to reach out to him.

"Let's just go-" He finally managed, eyes fixed on the ceiling above them, and one last collection of memories in easy leaping distance. He just felt M'gann's hand holding onto his as he jumped upwards and into that last cluster of thoughts, telling himself this would be done with soon enough.

-o-o-o-

"MAL!" Karen knew that shouting for him wouldn't make a difference, but she couldn't keep from yelling his name. He was already gone by then, vanished over the side of the ship. She strained her ears, waiting with a sick feeling knotting in her stomach for the sound of a body hitting the side of the ship, or splashing into the water below.

It didn't come, and what she heard instead reminded Karen to get back to moving; there were guns reloading, and Gar was scrabbling across the deck as he tried to shift into a smaller size...But still in the line of fire.

She wouldn't have traded for either Gar or Conner's abilities just then; not when there were that many bullets. Being a smaller target was definitely better then having more mass. She forced her breath to even out as she moved through the air. Ahead, she could pick out the squad; six all sweeping towards Gar as he snarled and tried to evade, and just beyond him, wherever Mal was.

 _'Even if he's okay, can't help him in either size.'_ The thought spiked through her head with as much force as her stings; it made her want to tense up instead of cutting and weaving through the air, and Karen tried to drown it out with other thoughts. _'Not directly at least. But I CAN cut down on one more threat.'_ With their focus on Garfield and the space where Mal had been, none of them were keeping an eye on her. Karen narrowed her own eyes on the squad of six as she dropped out of the air, reminding herself of the best pattern and path to take.

 _'Just like in training. Just like in cheerleading, too. You've done this a million times.'_ It was just timing the motions right, Karen reminded herself.

And before those guns had a time to zero in on Gar, now trying to push into the air as a green bird, she jabbed another sting right into the back of a gunman's neck. Then another, before he could register that the man off to his side was already falling to the floor. When the others turned, she yanked herself to the other side, quietly thanking how poor the visibility was, and dropped another two from that end. What the remaining two were yelling, she didn't know...But if she had to guess, Karen guessed that it was something like 'retreat.' The second one almost caught up with the first, before she sent one more jab through his neck and watched him thud against the floorboards.

She let the last run, even though a thought screamed at her in the voices of the older squad members that she was making a mistake...But she had to check. Karen went flying towards the edge of the ship. Right as Garfield shot back into the air and landed on the railing. "He's okay!" Gar peeped out, twitching his head so he was looking down the ship at Mal. Over the edge, Karen could just pick Mal out, clinging to one of the windows set into the ship side with one hand, the other tangled in the remains of the lifeboat rigging. When Gar gave a low squawk as he shifted, she had no trouble reading the meaning behind that; 'get back to Wendy and the others. I'll help him out.' Mal only had to raise his voice to add to that.

"I'll be fine! Go check that the others are okay too!" Gar dropped down as his paw clung onto the guardrail, stretching out into a long, scaly shape with a low hiss. Karen only had time to see something that looked a lot like a giant snake wrapping around her boyfriend. She shoved aside all those memories of B-Movie Horror film nights starring killer pythons with a twitch of her shoulders, and let her wings take her back towards the cabin.

 _'Alright...It's going to all work out.'_ She told herself, hoping that would help dull the shaking in her wrists and spine, and keep her flight path stable.

She could already pick out an outline in the window, which made her breathe a little easier...Right up until she saw the shape of body armor, and realized that Wendy had shown no inclination to stand up clear against the window. And that there was still that one gunman she hadn't accounted for.

Karen hissed out a curse as she flew for the doorway.

-o-o-o-

It wasn't like a puzzle after all, M'gann realized as the memory enveloped her. Instead it was like crashing through glass and trying to pick out all the pieces as she fell. She was caught in a whirlwind of thought and sensation; everything clawing at her mind and fighting for attention. Her skin burned, shivered, tensed and relaxed under punches and gentle touches. And through it all her memories flooded into her head, almost drowning her in a blur of images and voices. Everything tangled together, as she fought to pick out individual parts.

"You're strong, and I'm stubborn-" Conner shouted from someplace in the past. An impression of fingers closing around her twisted claws, and a low murmur of "I figured you'd tell me when you were ready" and a jolt of warmth.

Marie's death bit at her eyes again, that memory of collapsing to the floor as reality came crashing down around her. A heavy weight biting away at her before turning into resolve-

Conner's face watching her. Staring in disbelief as she tore away at anything that was a threat, slowly boiling into anger until he was standing in front of her in the cave.

 _'I don't remember this.'_ Came through in a jolt, as the image sharpened into something clearer. The floor turned solid under her feet, and she could feel her teeth tighten and clench as the details started to turn solid.

"You have to stop." Conner's voice was raised. "You're not any better then the people you're-" The words stung at her ears, fragmented through the blood pounding in her head. She felt heat rising up in her face as she shook her head. "I have to do something!" Her voice shouted back as M'gann felt herself bite the words out. "I'm not going to quit HELPING people; I'm not doing anything wrong!" Those words were sticking to her tongue strangely, even while she tried to pump conviction into them.

Conner shook his head as he drifted a step back, moving away from her. Pushing a gap between them and it made her heart shriek and try to burst open from how much it suddenly hurt. Shame was biting at her thoughts.

 _'This shouldn't have happened.'_ That hurt coiled tighter around her stomach and bit between her lungs, as she watched Conner murmur "You're supposed to be better then this" and look at her with so much disappointment that she wanted to take everything back. COULD take everything back if she moved fast-

She'd slipped into his head before she could fully process that idea, picking out where the anger started in both their memories and trying to mute it. Reminding herself that it'd be like this had never happened if they both forgot...Right as Conner's eyes went wide.

"DON'T!" He yelled into her ear, clutching at his head...And the link between them went slack. She was in his head one second, the next he wrenched away and pushed her out. Leaving her grasping at that anger still in his head...Seeing it burn away in his eyes.

 _'Conner, no!'_ She wanted to scream as he turned his back on her, shoulders tensed and bunched up in a way that she couldn't meet his eyes. But all she could manage was a broken "I'm sorry-"

"I'm sorry," she whispered again as she stared up at the stormy sky. "I'm so sorry..." And let her memories get peeled away, bit by bit. No more M'gann, the girl from Mars, the girl that did what she kept telling herself HAD to be done-

The girl that had broken and lost the thing she treasured...ALL because of her actions. She let the storm take all of that, stripping away her mistakes until she was just Megan, standing alone in the rain.

...Until now, M'gann realized as she watched herself, and felt something other then rain run down her cheeks in a hot, stinging trail.

-o-o-o-

_'Nothing like a little mortal terror for your friends to get your adrenaline going.'_ Karen thought as she flung herself through the air. It wasn't really flying; it was falling and hoping she'd get into the room before her velocity ran out and she hit the floor. How long did she have until her friends were under the gun? Conner might be able to survive it...But he was still out. She didn't know what the Martian limits on regeneration were, and she KNEW that Wendy couldn't survive a bullet. She threw herself past the windows, just catching Wendy standing over her friends with a 'you won't take them without going through me' look on her face as she watched the gunman.

"What is it you plan on doing?" The voice sneered out from beneath the covering on his mouth, thick with contempt. "You're on the records here as a student; you don't have any powers; no shape shifting, super strength...Nothing." Still talking...But Karen counted off the seconds and knew that she didn't have much time. Not enough to reach them before they finished speaking and went for the guns.

"No." Wendy's voice was shockingly level. "I don't have any of that. But I DO have one thing you didn't take into account. And that gives me an edge against you." Karen rounded the corner too slow, knowing that the time was already up.

"Oh-?"

"Moxie." Wendy replied, matter-of-fact. Right as Karen darted through the hole in the window. She just realized that Wendy's hand was grasped tight around a red bottle, which she snapped up and squeezed at the gunman's face. He got an eyeful of red condiment while he shouted, trying scrub his eyes free.

He couldn't clean his face before Karen had closed the gap. Her fingers still hurt from those stings, and she wasn't sure if she had time for a precise enough strike. Instead she closed her eyes, braced herself...And let herself fall through the air as she went back to full size.

 _'Oh hell. This is going to hurt-!'_ She had just enough time to think before she crashed into the gunman's back. He went shock still and rigid underneath her back, before he buckled forward while she curled to keep her head protected. A second later she could feel his armor biting into her side, and then the floor doing its best to push as many bruises as possible into her elbows and knees. Her vision swam as she lifted her head up.

If she felt bad, the gunman looked a LOT worse. And he wasn't raising his head. Wendy collapsed against the sofa as she looked at Karen, her breath coming out in a whoosh. "Hey, points for a dramatic entrance. Makes up for shaving a couple years off my life with how last minute it was." Karen groaned as a reply, trying to pick herself back up.

"Wouldn't have thought of using ketchup; thanks for buying me some time with that." Wendy gave a stuttering laugh, shaking her head.

"Believe me, I would have used pepper spray instead, if I could've...Just tell me I won't have to do that again?"

"Not for a few minutes, at least." Came a new voice, and Karen let herself breath out when she saw Malcolm standing in the doorway, and not looking worse for wear. Gar stepped up next to him as well, with an eager 'I did good, right?' on his face. "We beat them back, just like you said!" He chirped, while Mal stepped forward and stretched out his hand to help her up.

"Good..." Karen groaned as she took his hand. "Gives us a few minutes to breathe...And hope that those two are doing SOMETHING about Psimon. I don't want to try that again without them."

-o-o-o-

Superboy almost drowned in the rush of memories when they leapt into the last shard. They slammed into him like a torrent, leaving him spinning as they roared around in his ears and swept him up. Swept him AWAY from M'gann, Superboy realized with a jolt that sent him twisting around and trying to find her in the chaos.

"M'gann!?" He reached for her, fingers and thoughts grasping for her presence. For a second he thought he could feel her, but the next she was torn away from him. Leaving him floating in her memories, alone as those thoughts bent all their focus on M'gann. He had just enough time to breathe before he was enveloped again, and found himself staring at a skin crawlingly familiar scene.

Conner watched as he turned his back on M'gann. As she fell to her knees and whispered just on the edge of his hearing how sorry she was. The vision of him never turned around to listen to her, just kept walking and shutting her words out. He could feel that same rage and hurt from before starting to coil up in him as he watched, snapping around his heart and making it pound in a way that made him see red; how ready he was to shut her out if she was going to be a hazard. He was ready to turn and leave as well, but his feet were held fast to the ground and left him to watch. When that image of him faded, the memory of M'gann was still there, shaking on the floor, alone.

 _'Abandoned-'_ He couldn't stop the word from sinking into his thoughts, even while Conner jolted his head from side to side.

"I didn't do anything wrong! None of this was my fault!" That shade of M'gann curled up as he shouted, trying to hide behind her shoulder from his words. He couldn't see her eyes, but the way her head hung low was enough to push that scalding anger out of his head and turn it into a tight, stabbing feeling as it coiled up in his chest.

"M-" He couldn't kneel down to tell her it wasn't all her fault, that he didn't mean it like that; his back refused to bend, staying rigid and tall, while his throat refused to let anymore words out. "Still prideful," he couldn't even scream 'shut up!' when Psimon's voice cut in. "No wonder the S-shield is trying to burn you out; like progenitor, like clone."

Psimon stood in front of him, flickering at the edges as he watched Superboy with a mixture of interest and smugness...Though Conner could just pick out how much tension was in the psychic, as he forced himself to stand against barrage of M'gann's memories. Still, he kept his eyes on Superboy's emblem.

"You-" His words tried to snap out that Psimon did this to him, somehow. That he'd pushed something into his chest and it was burning away at him...But the words were hollow in his head. The burn mark stretching across his chest bit at him again, and that time he could pick out the shape of it.

It was the same as what he wore on his shirt. And all that pain coming from it was centered square in his chest. Flaring up with HIS rage and burning him out. Swinging his fist at Psimon didn't fix that; it just made the pain worse as the psychic faded out, still laughing. Conner stumbled forward, clutching at his shirt with his free hand and feeling the fire jump from one patch of skin to another as he fell towards the floor.

Time slowed down as it rushed up to meet him. In the corners of his vision, he realized that M'gann's phantom wasn't kneeling on the floor anymore. He twisted, movements sluggish as his lungs tried to turn to cinders and his eyes watered. He felt rain starting to hit his face as M'gann lifted her head up to the sky, and her words hissed through his head.

 _"I'm so sorry...But I'm ready to forget."_ His eyes went wide as she spoke, and as Conner felt her memories fray. She'd done this to herself-

 _'It wasn't just her that caused this.'_ The embers lodged in his heart paused as he thought that...And as he smashed into the floor.

The memory and vision snapped to pieces, the same way a bone bent and broke under too much pressure. Conner blinked against the sudden glare biting at his eyes as he stared up and clutched at the S-shield. His heart stopped pounding out fire as his vision finally refocusing on a familiar violet space. The glow coming from the fragments above seemed brighter then before, and stronger-

" _Not as strong as I feared."_ Psimon's voice in his head spurred him onto his feet, although the psychic was nowhere to be seen. _"Your skills are rusty, Martian. And you've run out of memories and lies to hide behind."_ He clearly wasn't where they were…But fast approaching, from how much louder those thoughts were biting at his head. He narrowed his eyes, feeling his hands tense into fists, for all the good those would do if it turned into a showdown.

"M'gann, we have to do something. M'gann?" No answer, and he couldn't feel any warmth from her by his side. Even her thoughts felt dulled and diminished. "M'gann?" Conner tried again, looking around. "Answer-"

Her response wasn't words. It was a choking gasp that caught on his ears, and pulled his eyes to the far corner of the cavern.

M'gann wasn't in her green skin, wasn't even human. One claw was wrapped over her face, while the other clutched at the white and purple muscle of her shoulder. She kept her head turned away from him, her entire body shaking as her breath came out in strained sobs that rasped in her throat and tore at his ears. When he stepped forward and tried her name again, she still wouldn't look at him. Instead, she curled up tighter, leaving him with staring at the mass of her neck and back...Which flinched when he put a hand on her arm as she tried to pull away.

" _I should have stayed as Megan. She'd never hurt her friends like that."_ She shook under his touch, shaking her head back and forth as those thoughts pounded in both their heads.

" _Should have permanently wiped my memories, so I couldn't-"_ Her words choked out, and she finally looked at Conner through those red eyes. Her voice was just a whisper in his head, heavy with self-loathing. _"You should have let them kill me."_

"You...Th-think I stopped caring about you?" She started at his words as he pushed them out. His lungs were still searing with each breath he took, leaving his voice hoarse. Compared to that, her skin was shockingly cold underneath his fingers. Her sides were shaking just as much as his, though.

Conner shut his eyes, focusing until he could find their link again, and use that to speak. He was desperate to have something reach her, before Psimon showed up or he burned out completely. The searing spurred him on, a fuse that was starting to burn low. _'Don't burn out yet'_ he had time to tell himself. _'Not until you get her to listen.'_ And maybe that would do something to help. Or at least give him some peace of mind before the S-shield made him a charred husk.

 _"M'gann, please..."_ He fixed his eyes with hers. _"You made a mistake, but that doesn't mean I hate you! And I sure as hell didn't stop loving you. I want to see you face them,"_ his arms strained as he tried to pull her up. _"Learn from them, and beat them. But don't keep running away!"_ Her body was heavy, larger then him in that form...But it suddenly felt lighter as he pulled at her shoulders. And she looked smaller when she breathed in again, shutting her eyes as her face started to smooth out into something a little more human.

"Conner, I..." Her voice was rough, as the green started to move back through her skin. "I'm not running. I..." _'Don't deserve to be M'gann. I can't be trusted with my powers.'_ Her thoughts and memories hissed around them. That same self loathing he'd heard hours ago in the lounge, on the edge of her voice was back in full force. Conner tried to drown it out by keeping his hands on her arms, feeling the muscles in them still sighing as they shifted under his touch.

"You're not facing things. How long are you going to keep..." Running, hiding, and not acting like the real M'gann. "You're supposed to be better then this."

 _'I know you're better then this.'_ He wasn't sure if she heard that or not. From the way she stayed slack under his grip, he didn't think that was the case. She was back in a human shape...But she still looked so fragile that his own hands started to quiver, worried what he might do if he kept hanging onto her. He forced his fingers to relax-

Right as something cracked across his back like a whip, pitching him forward and onto his knees. And he caught a different pale form in the corners of his eyes, a triumphant look plastered across the newcomer's face.

"Interesting as this game has been," he looked between M'gann and Conner. "I think it's time to bring it to a close."


	9. M'gann The Mighty

"That's it for the counter." Mal announced, still keeping one eye on the window. The fact that he'd almost gone straight into the harbor didn't seem to phase him much, which Garfield tried to emulate as he stood next to Mal.

"O-okay." He winced, forcing himself to try and keep a cool sounding voice. "So...What's the plan now, Thunderbir-" It wasn't that Mal glared at him, at least not like Superboy sometimes did. It was just the way he rolled his eyes as he glanced over at Karen that kept Gar from saying the full code name.

...And here he was sure Mal would have _liked_ Thunderbird One. "So, what are we doing from here?"

"Right now, what we need is..." Mal trailed off, glancing up as a low hum moved through the building. Almost like a helicopter passing in too low, as some of the stationary on the tables started to rattle. Gar squeezed a little more flexibility into his ears so he could push them back and flat, while his tail started to lash. There was something pushing at his shoulders and chest, almost like a force...And he could feel it pushing OUT from where his sister and Superboy were still stretched across the floor.

"That's not something we needed." Mal's voice was thick with exasperation...And a twinge of nervousness, Gar thought. "Any ideas on what's going on?" His eyes darted around as he asked, trying to find whatever was causing the hum. Though Gar was already getting the feeling that they wouldn't be able to see it, and that raised every hair on his back.

"I-I remember sis telling me about this before." He didn't know how that draft had gotten into the room, but he could feel it blowing against his skin and ruffling his hair as he crouched down. "It happened when she fought Psimon before; something about psychic feedback?" He hadn't really questioned it, other then thinking it sounded cool. But now that he was standing right in the middle of something like it, 'cool' was getting traded out for 'scary.'

"What else did she say?" Karen was already tugging Wendy away from the two, while the windows rattled in their panes.

"A lot, but I think the most important thing is finding something to hold onto!" Gar yelled as the wind started to pick up.

-o-o-o-

M'gann stared as her teammate slumped to the ground, dimly aware that Psimon stood in the same space as them...But finding it hard to care, compared to what she'd just seen in her own head. Conner's back was a mess of knots and tension, an eerie call back to what had happened during their argument.

 _"Too slow, Martian."_ Psimon's voice was a snarl in her head, tearing her away from that memory. _"You can't gather your thoughts, or your focus; now for the end game."_ As Psimon gloated, the sunlight and mindscape under her feet started to dim out. It was like the sun had just been blocked out, and the entire power grid went with it, as the scenery below fell into shadow. M'gann tore her eyes away as a crackling sound filled her ears, and looked up in time to see the walls that made up the cave start to fill with black lines. Radiating out from those marks was a buzz that filled her ears, while the lines moved like cracks in ice. They went scrambling up the sides of her mental walls in a jittery motion...Until they reached where her memories had been set back in place.

Her head screamed out, and M'gann's hands clawed at her temples as something in her started to strain and break under the pressure. The ache grew as she watched those mended memories start to flicker, pulsing dim and bright. They were trembling as well, twitching so much it looked like her memories were trying to flee from the breaks...Until the cracks raced across them, looking like black cuts. When they sliced across the shards, the light went out of all of them, plunging her mind into blackness. She wanted to scream, until her eyes widened enough to pick out a low ambient glow that only just illuminated herself and Conner. The air around them was heavy on her shoulders and in her lungs, a dark mist starting to coat them both.

Superboy was twisting around and to his feet, trying to look everywhere as his fists balled up. His eyes were tinged violet again, wide open and bright against the rest of his face. M'gann started to move closer to him-

Which was a signal for her surroundings. The dark air rushed around them, growing more solid, until it was a fog that drove itself between her and Conner. Superboy threw a punch at it, for all the good it did him; his fist moved through air as the fog coiled around him.

She could hear the memory of their confrontation repeating itself in her head, her own voice whispered _'Like it never happened'_ over and over while the mist swirled around Conner. She shook her head, trying to shake that memory free, but by the time she could focus, it was like the mist had turned into a veil, solid and impossible to move through.

"Conner...!?" He moved his lips, trying to speak through the fog that was closing around him. He might have been saying her name, but she couldn't hear it...Just a strangled sound when the barrier suddenly broke and then reformed into a tighter knot around his throat. All while Psimon's laugh echoed off her mind.

 _"You can't save him, anymore then you can save yourself. And you've just shown that you can't fight your nature."_ The ground under her feet started to shift, crackling and feeling like she was standing on thin ice. M'gann couldn't keep from looking down...And saw that her mental world was completely gone. That buzz from before had turned into a roar, as she stared down into something dark and roiling; a maelstrom of something dark that churned and seemed to reach for her and Conner. And just beyond that pounding noise, M'gann thought she could pick out fragments of thoughts; sharp whispers and jagged things she'd told herself before. How it wouldn't hurt Conner, or how those people deserved what she did to them...

...How much she hated what she'd become. She couldn't shut that out, anymore then she could block Psimon's voice. _"Darkness is a part of you, girl. The proof is right there...Now why don't we test if it's still as violent and destructive as before."_

Superboy didn't yell or scream when the floor broke beneath him; couldn't, from how the miasma was still wrapped around his throat. She could see his mouth open as he plunged into the maelstrom, while his hand stretched out to try and catch onto something. The strangled sound that came out of her mouth was loud enough for both of them, though. She stretched out her hand, trying to find that telekinesis from before...But nothing came. Her thoughts, her powers wouldn't listen to her, as Conner hit the surface of those dark thoughts, and then sank beneath them, swallowed up by blackness.

"No...Conner..." She sank to her knees, her head dipping under the weight of those thoughts still sinking their teeth into the back of her head. _'He's better off like this.'_ They snarled at her. _'You didn't need any of this before-'_ She couldn't bring herself to lift her body back up, even though she knew Psimon stood behind her; she could hear his footsteps, sure and steady across the broken surface.

 _"Smart girl. I'll make this painless for you."_ His voice promised that she wouldn't last long, either way. M'gann squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for the last blow to fall and leave her shattered again.

 _'Are you going to keep running away?'_ Conner's words growled in the back of her head, over the weights that were sinking into her thoughts and body. His voice spoke again, as her throat tried to choke up. _'I know you're better...'_ Tears stung at the corners of her eyes, as her hands balled into fists. _'You can be better then this, M'gann.'_

Her eyes opened, and her head snapped up fast enough to break out of that despair that had chained her down. She caught Psimon in the corners of her eyes, staring for a moment before smirking and shaking his head. _"...Come now. You can't fight yourself."_

"...I can try." She whispered, feeling her legs bunch up underneath her as M'gann pulled herself to her feet. She had time for one deep breath as she listened to Conner's voice again, then threw herself into the maelstrom after him.

The air bit at her face, trying to drive her eyes shut. Instead she squinted against the wind, keeping her sight on the black waves in front of her; it looked like she was falling into a storm-wracked ocean in the middle of the night...And when she hit the surface, her thoughts engulfed and washed over M'gann with a chill that bit straight into her bones. M'gann gasped...But forced her eyes to stay open as she dove.

Light, even a ring of dark violet overhead, was a fading memory. One that was being smothered by the worst of her thoughts as she fell deeper and deeper. They bit at her ears, in her own voice and in Conner's. 'Inferior,' clawed at her, along with 'twisted' and 'freak.' And a low urging voice to give up on this, that she should just yield to the other psychic in her head; it wasn't like she was any different from him. Or just go back to being Megan instead of M'gann.

Against that she had Conner's words, and M'gann held them close. They weren't much, just a handful against all those thoughts...But they somehow kept the worst of the barbs out as she searched for him.

 _"Conner?"_ She stared down, looking for a flash of motion somewhere in the depths. Her throat went dry as her eyes found nothing, and she felt the pull increase as she was dragged down. Her heart beat against her chest, so hard she thought it was trying to break free and get back to the surface. _'Don't let this control you.'_ M'gann told herself, still peering into the gloom and diving further down; her thoughts shrieked at her, but she kept her focus on looking for Conner and calling for him. He had to be here somewhere-

The answer to her calls wasn't verbal. Wasn't even physical, like a hand grasping for hers or a shoulder drifting into and bumping against her. Instead M'gann felt her awareness shift out of her body, twist into something half aware, battered and confused...But still stubbornly clinging onto what little consciousness it had left. She could feel Conner's thoughts, feel through his skin and wince from the brand settled across his chest. There was a heaviness lodged between his lungs and just underneath that burn as well, pulling him down. But through that, his eyes flickered open for a second, and picked out her figure impossibly far away as her named croaked out between his lips. Her awareness snapped back, and she could just hear "M'gann..." from below as she twisted around and swam after him, where she KNEW he'd been a thought before.

The space around her wanted to turn to real water and ink as she swam; have all those dark thoughts pour down her throat and into her lungs to make them halt up. M'gann's best response was to keep her thoughts on Conner; keep focusing on the flit of red below her and reaching it...

...It kept the darkness away long enough to get close to him, at least. She could see that his eyes were rolled back in his head, that his sides were barely moving as he sunk. And she could still feel his pain flaring up along his chest, driving him to keep his eyes shut and his mind numb to everything.

Her hand flashed out, catching him around the arm as she let her fingers lengthen and thicken enough to hang onto him. Her knuckles started to go pale as she forced herself to focus and prayed for one more moment of clarity as her thoughts pulled them down. _"SUPERBOY!"_ She screamed into his head, with enough force and volume to make his thoughts jolt back into motion. His eyes shot open as he lurched forward, staring wide eyed as he thrashed away from her.

 _"Conner, don't-! It's me!"_ He stopped in the same instant she whispered that out. His eyes were ringed with white, staring at her as he shook his head. "You found me-?" he started to say, when something slammed into them, nearly tearing him free from her grip and sending them both tumbling through the almost-water, half like being caught in a current...Or an explosion, M'gann winced as the force pushed at her sides.

 _"You think you can run from me?"_ She could feel Psimon digging those words into her head like claws, and tugging and wrenching her head to one side. _"I've got the worst of you in my hands, Martian; I can break you using your own thoughts...And I promise it won't be quick. You'll be screaming for the void before I'm through with you."_

Her surroundings shifted from chilling and suffocating to violent. She could hear Psimon shouting threats and promises of what he'd do to her...And feel the worst of that darkness trying to tear her to shreds. It swarmed at her, trying to beat her head back down, leaving her broken and cowering from them again.

"It's okay," M'gann tried to speak over that as she held Conner close. Hoping she sounded confident that she could somehow make those words true. "I'm not going to let him hurt you." She promised as the roar grew. "I'm not going to let anything hurt you." Not her own thoughts, at least. She felt him moving his hand to wrap around her arm as he watched her, and swore she saw a flicker of fire in his throat as he opened his mouth.

"N...Not going to let anything happen to you either." He slumped forward so their heads bumped together, and another thought jumped between them. _"I'm not going to turn away from you again. I promise."_ He curled against her as that burn in his chest started to sear at both of them. She didn't let the hurt loosen her fingers, hanging onto him as she nodded and brushed their cheeks together. Conner's breath was ragged and slow as he inhaled. When it snapped back out of his chest, she could already feel shock bolting through him. For an instant she didn't know why he was so surprised...But then at the edges of where their thoughts touched, she realized that the pain in his chest had been snuffed out; she couldn't feel agony or fire on either of their skins any longer. His head moved up, not curling in from pain any longer, and she could see how his strength was back in his shoulders. Even the mark on his skin looked fainter, and had lost that baleful glow.

M'gann stared up at the surface, which somehow was closer then before as she squared her own shoulders back.

 _"I know who I am."_ She told that distant ring of light, and the psychic standing beyond it. _"I'm someone who makes mistakes, but-"_ The thought was almost drowned out as the void screamed at her. Almost shook her to pieces until she felt Conner reaching for her wrist. _"...But I don't have to let them define who I am, or control me."_ She could just catch a glimmer of something hopeful in Conner's eyes as she said that, before Psimon howled at them both. And as the tide surged at them, screaming pain and anger.

_"Stupid creature! You think you can stand against this!? You're a coward-"_

_"No."_ M'gann stared at those currents, steady as the darkness broke around her and Conner like waves on shore rocks. _"Before I was dedicated to running away. Now I'm dedicating myself to stopping YOU."_

Conner shifted his grip so his fingers wrapped around her hand, and for a brief second the howling was drowned out as she glanced at him. And could just realize how similar this was to before. He nodded, squeezing at her fingers.

The maelstrom parted, like a knife had just torn through it and left the storm to blow itself to pieces. For a second it felt like they were falling...Before her thoughts suddenly went stable and M'gann pushed her will outwards, convincing gravity to let go of her. She hung in the air with Conner, watching as the black leached out of their surroundings and left them both hovering over a familiar landscape. The sun still hung low in the sky, washing orange over her patchwork mindscape. The sunlight was warm on her skin as she looked over the different fragments of her memory.

"This is still my head," M'gann whispered, looking around. "And now we're fighting where I'M at my best." Conner's touch was cool against her hand, no longer burning or desperate...Or afraid. She felt his calmness soak into her, holding her steady and strong against what was left of Psimon's attack. When it ran out, she could see him standing open in the sky, staring at them both in disbelief.

"You don't belong here." Conner growled out, and when he lifted their hands up, she could feel power coursing through her body and up along her arm. "So get out of her head." Her thoughts felt stronger, brighter then before...Right as a familiar light lanced out past their hands, cutting through the distance and slamming into Psimon. He had no purchase against the attack, getting pushed back further and further.

The blackness he'd tried to pull out of her was waiting for him, at the very edge of her mentalscape. Those breaks and cracks Psimon had pushed into her head were waiting for him, and coiled around him like snakes when he hit them. The light from her and Conner flashed brilliantly for an instant, too bright to see by...But she could hear Psimon's horrified shriek as he was swallowed up by light and dark, and was shoved free from her head with a wail.

-o-o-o-

The bottom dropped out of Garfield's stomach a second before every single window in the room shattered. He yelled out something about hitting the deck; he couldn't even hear himself with how the air howled and started to twist up. It was like they were in a storm.

With M'gann and Conner forming the eye of it, still motionless. They were the only things that weren't affected from the force tearing through the room and whipping the air into a frenzy.

The wind shrieked past Garfield's ears as he dropped down to the floor, letting his fingers grow into claws and sink them into the floor. At the edge of his vision he could see Mal curled over Karen and Wendy...Though as the energy in the air shrieked and howled overhead, Gar started to realize the worst it did to him and the others was give them a good shove.

At least that was the case close to Conner and M'gann. If that power shot by and over his head along with Wendy, Karen, and Mal...He couldn't say the same as he looked over his shoulder and saw how the window frames were buckling from the force. And just beyond it he could see outlines, more of those soldiers, getting swept up like so many dead leaves. There was barely time for them to yell before they were tossed away by the currents tearing through the air.

"Wow. Couldn't time that better." Karen rubbed at her ears, standing up as the surge subsided and glanced around. Her eyes narrowed as she looked through the shattered remains of the glass, before a hesitant smile worked its way across her face. "Folks...I think we might be out of the woods."

Garfield still held his breath, waiting to see if the gunfire would start up again. But the air had gone amazingly still, and the storm had blown itself out completely; all he could pick out was water lapping at the hull of the boat. And, he realized with a jump up from the floor that snapped him back into his usual shape, he could pick out, M'gann's breathing change as she and Superboy finally stirred.

-o-o-o-

Conner expected a headache when he opened his eyes again. It was almost a disappointment when he blinked to clear his vision, and felt complete clarity instead of any pain pounding away at his temples. The rest of him felt stiff and bruised enough to make up for that, though, and his muscles all groaned as he pushed himself up.

Looking around, he wasn't sure how they'd ended up in a derelict building. Conner was pretty sure they'd been in a place with furniture and windows before...Though after a second his eyes managed to pick out some familiar framework in the roof overhead. Or at least what little remained of the roof, and the walls. He was even sure he could see a table smashed halfway through the window, before a voice cut into his attention.

"Hey...Welcome back to the world of the living, Conner." Mal stepped forward as he spoke, his voice a low rumble...While Gar was a green blur jumping between him and M'gann, staring between both of them. "YOU-!" He started to say, before he caught himself. Conner was sure he was about to say 'scared me half to death' but instead he settled for tugging Conner at the shoulder, and squeezing M'gann's arm to make sure they were both really back.

"Didn't expect to wake up to this," he muttered, while Mal shook his head, and Karen took up the slack as she stepped into the non-blurry part of his vision. "Well, we didn't expect either of you to go out cold and leave us to handle the fight...OR tear up the building with whatever happened in your heads. I hope you gave that psychic creep the same treatment you gave the roof?"

Conner managed a nod, while M'gann gave a groan as she started to roll onto her side with a weak "Conner...?" slipping out of her mouth. Her eyes were unfocused, and she was going through the same process of blinking to clear them.

"You're okay? You're still here?" Her fingers twitched and curled, trying to find his hand and only closing around air, until Conner's hand wrapped around hers. "Yeah..." It was strange that after everything, his voice could manage quiet and something other then rough. But it got M'gann's sides to move a little more steadily, her breath coming out in a long relieved sigh.

"Hey, Karen?" Wendy's voice was somewhere behind him, and Conner could hear her gingerly picking her way across the torn remains of the room to where Bumblebee was. "If we are out of trouble now,"

"We are." Karen's voice was sure and steady, and glancing up from M'gann Conner could glimpse her looking through the remains of the windows. When he narrowed his own eyes to see if he could pick out anything, the only warm outlines of color in his vision were those inside. "Then...I'm thinking it won't be long until we get a whole lot of flashing lights and security around the boat. You might want a witness to explain that you beat back a hostile force, maybe?" And from her tone, he could tell that Wendy was volunteering.

"...And maybe stall long enough for those two to recover? Yeah, I see what you're saying." Karen moved towards the door as she spoke. "Lead the way, Wendy." M'gann's roommate paused in the doorway just long enough to give them another glance over; making sure everything WAS okay, Conner guessed. Then she was gone, moving with a strength his battered legs were just a touch envious of.

"Hey, Gar...Could use an extra pair of eyes, just in case." Mal spoke up from his side of the room, and Gar perked up at that. "Sure thing, Thunderbird One!" Mal didn't do anything other then sigh and turn his eyes back out on the deck.

Leaving Conner with M'gann, who was finally pushing herself up to look at him. There was so much relief in her eyes as she watched him, and her fingers tightened around his hand.

"I'm so glad you're okay...I didn't want either of us to die before I could tell you that I'm sorry." She kept her voice low, meant just for him. "I didn't want anything like this to happen...And I'm sorry for what I did to bring this on." As he listened, Conner turned his hand around so they were palm to palm, fingers matching up. "You...Don't hate me though?"

Conner shook his head, and kept his own voice at a murmur. "...I almost burnt out in there. I'm not sure I'm in a hurry to feel anything like that again, any time soon..." He wove his fingers around the back of her hand, giving it a squeeze. "...And I know that I'm sick of walking around, feeling like there's only half of me. I'm more then ready for something else."

That empty space was the only thing he was really angry over just then. And when M'gann put her free hand over his chest, spreading her fingers so she could pick out his heartbeat, even that irritation started to fade. Leaving him with a different set of thoughts working their way onto his lips.

"There was something I wanted to ask you. When you beat back Psimon and had control of your thoughts, we were back in that..." He shut his eyes, trying to describe it. "Location tangle in your head. Why...There?" He would have thought she'd choose a place like the Bio-Ship, or the mission room in the cave; somewhere she was in her element. And where she had a clear edge and advantage against Psimon.

When he opened his eyes, it was to M'gann's cheeks going bring pink. And while she colored, her mouth couldn't seem to decide whether to frown in worry or twitch into a half smile. "Oh...Well, if you want the honest answer..." She glanced at him, while that blush deepened. "...I remembered the first time I beat Psimon in Bialya, and how it was with you. My head chose that...Because I'm at my best when I'm with you."

Maybe it was due to how much they'd just been through, that his adrenaline was finally dying off and leaving his tongue a lot more clumsy then before...But Conner couldn't think of much to say to that. The way his cheeks burned and he blinked at M'gann seemed to satisfy her though...Especially when she rested her head against his shoulder and smiled when she saw that tiny, half awkward but still there smile of his own.


	10. Epilogue: Awake

The Bio-Ship wouldn't stop humming into her head, like a nervous puppy that hadn't seen her in forever. There was still a sore edge to its presence, telling her that it hadn't fully healed from the attack, but was at least on the mend. M'gann found herself having to constantly assure the Bio-Ship that she was back, and that she didn't plan on leaving it again. And working in an occasional _"I'm sorry"_ when the fretting really increased. When M'gann placed her bags inside the ship cabin, the worried buzz toned down a little; maybe the ship was just reassured now that something of hers was back in close contact with it. But that didn't keep M'gann from resting her hand on the wall and gave it a gentle psychic nudge. _"It's okay; I promise I'm back."_ It still gave a worried pulse, not fully convinced...But it at least let her step back outside, content with holding the bags.

M'gann blinked up at the sky as she stepped back onto the dorm's deck, her eyes feeling heavy. She hadn't really slept over the night, instead catching a few short catnaps between events; twenty minutes after the police arrived, then another handful of minutes as Karen filled out the reports and not so subtly kept her and Conner shoo'd off to the side. Most of that sleep had been spent on Conner's shoulder, though he didn't seem to mind that much. M'gann also had the suspicion that he'd rested his eyes and his head against her, as well. Those naps at least gave her enough rest to not feel completely muddled, and leave her to appreciate the morning. She could feel the sun light starting to warm up her skin...Which she noticed couldn't seem to decide on what color it wanted to be, now that she'd rediscovered how to change it.

"You're really leaving?" Wendy's voice was thick with fatigue, and when M'gann turned to look at her, she could pick out dark circles under the other girl's eyes. But she was still standing tall, meeting M'gann eye to eye...Although she did blink in surprise as M'gann tried to hold onto a Caucasian color instead of green.

"Maybe not forever; I want to keep up with my major. And maybe I'm not...Completely Megan Morse all the time, but I want to have a normal life sometimes." She glanced over the dormitory again, frowning at the damage, while her fingers switched back to green. "But it's going to take time to fix the dorms, and I'm going to need somewhere else to live." Wendy gave a slow nod, glancing at the chunks missing from the deck.

"You know...You could come with us?" M'gann offered, drawing her friend's eyes back up. "You're in on the secret now, and it wouldn't be too hard to zeta back to classes. Besides, I know you need a place to stay as well." Even with the fatigue on her face, Wendy managed to push it out long enough to give her a smile.

"I might consider it...It's going to be hard to find a roommate that can bake as well as you can. And I'm still technically your upperclassman; I wouldn't be setting a good example if I let you off that easy." M'gann had to remind herself not to grow extra arms when she wrapped Wendy up in a hug. "Though I hope things aren't going to always end up wrecked."

"Actually, this is a lot better off then what usually happens during our missions. Nothing really exploded this time."

"...M'gann," She could hear how Wendy tested her real name, pausing a little over how it was pronounced. "You really need to work on your sales pitch when it comes to living arrangements. And how good the lifestyle is."

"Well...It's harsh, sometimes." M'gann admitted. "But now that I remember it...I'm not sure why I wanted to trade it out." The fib came easier then she wanted to admit. But Wendy didn't need to know that, just then. When she let Wendy go, M'gann was already hovering a few inches off the ground, while her telekinesis itched to go higher. "I'll be back soon enough, okay? Just wanted to take one last look around."

Wendy didn't do more then nod when M'gann pushed herself into the sky. Her arms and legs stung for a moment as her weight shifted around, not used to being off the ground for so long.

 _'At least in the real world.'_ She reminded herself, letting those memories of flight and how to move through the air and sky flow back into her mind. Her powers began to take over, and within seconds she was winding through the sky and watching it change from pink tinged to a soft blue.

Looking down, she could pick out a familiar green field against the buildings. Feeling her heart trying to climb up into her throat, M'gann sent herself down towards it. When her feet touched the grass of the football field, they'd shifted into her cheerleader shoes, while the rest of her outfit followed. Her skin blushed back to peach, though the green lurked underneath her fingernails.

"Saying goodbye?" She started a good foot into the air, before turning to find Conner watching her.

"Sort of...And reminding myself." She eased down one inch, then a second as her outfit started to shiver again. It took more concentration then she had to keep it in a cheerleader costume, so as she spoke it started to settle into something between that and a pink cardigan and shirt. "I...You know this is where I blanked out my memories, right?"

He gave a nod, glancing around. "I had a hunch...Figured that I might find you here, too." Every time Conner blinked, her skin gave a quick ripple, flickering and changing; Caucasian, then green, then back when he looked at her again.

"How you feeling?"

"...Different." M'gann admitted, and then added as he continued to watch and her color flickered between green on her hands and peach on her arms, "A little strange. Kind of unsure...And nervous." He didn't say anything; just raised his eyebrows in a way that asked her to continue.

"Am I doing the right thing with going back? There's still so much I've got to make up for...I'm not sure how to handle it. Or if this is even the right thing to do."

"...When you make a lot of mistakes," Conner's voice was low and heavy. "It's easy to think you can't do anything right again. But you shouldn't just give up." He let his breath out in a low sigh. "Trust me...I know that."

"You said you never stopped loving me, even after what happened..."

"...Did you stop feeling the same? Even when you traded out everything for this?" He glanced up at the buildings, then back at her.

"No. I-I ran away because I couldn't stop feeling that. I know...Stupid mistake-" She could feel how harsh even the weakened sunlight felt on her skin, and without looking already knew that it had shifted to white. Her breath caught in her throat as she glanced away, and before it had time to leave as a sob Conner's arms were around her.

With one arm squeezing at her shoulders, his other hand was on the back of her head, fingers tracing through her hair and over her neck. He kept running them over her head, in a steady motion that combed her bangs and any loose strands back. M'gann felt her breathing starting to synchronize with the touch, until finally her heart began to slow down, and she could inhale and exhale without feeling like her lungs were trying to shake themselves apart. Focusing on his touch felt more important then feeling shaky or worried, at least.

"Don't think like that. It didn't stop you from saving me when it counted." Conner's hands shook against her for a moment, and she could feel something in him hesitate. "Didn't keep you from doing the right thing." He sighed into her ear. He kept one hand against her neck, while the other moved from her shoulders to her face as M'gann sighed into his neck. She traced her own fingers along the red S on his shirt, before wrapping them underneath his arms and around his back.

"You also didn't wreck an entire school while learning, so you're doing better then me." She KNEW that she wasn't imagining that wryness in his voice, or the humor in his eyes when she lifted her face to stare up at him.

"...Conner Kent. Did you really just make a joke?"

"Yeah...First time for everything, though." And maybe a first time for recovering, M'gann couldn't help but think.

"Right...I guess there is, isn't there?" She managed a laugh as she spoke. When Conner let go of her face to hold her arms and draw his hands down them, she felt her black costume come back, wrapping around her body. "So, you're ready to face a few more things?" Somehow, she also got the impression of 'with me?' in his words. Maybe because he wrapped his fingers around hers as he said that.

"I think I am. And if you don't mind...I'd like to go back with you..." Conner let go of her hand long enough to trace his fingers over her side, before resting his head against hers. _"I'd like nothing else."_ Conner murmured into her thoughts, eyes shut while M'gann let hers slide shut and brush her thumb across his cheek. When they both opened their eyes again, M'gann saw her hand cupping his face, and that her skin had remained green.

"I'm ready," M'gann whispered again as she rested against his chest. When she turned back towards where the Bio-Ship was waiting, she kept her fingers in his hand. "To be myself again."

The End


End file.
